


Lessie and Benji

by zarrati



Series: Three Houses Down [2]
Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-25
Updated: 2016-10-19
Packaged: 2018-06-04 09:00:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 21,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6651424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zarrati/pseuds/zarrati
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Benji Wyatt moved to Pawnee, he didn't expect his new neighbor to bring over brownies, or for her to become his best friend in the world.</p><p>A story chronicling Ben and Leslie's relationship from elementary school through college.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I had some really great feedback from my "The Boy Three Houses Down" fic, and I love this universe so much that a sort of "prequel" story basically wrote itself. This is a brief glimpse into their friendship from its beginning until the summer before high school. I might write another chapter that follows them drifting apart, spanning the High School and early college years. Please let me know your thoughts!

“Leslie?”

She pulls her nose away from the window. “Yes, Mom?”

“How about instead of being nosey, we make some brownies to take over to the new neighbors?”

Leslie hops off of the couch and runs to the kitchen. “I get to lick the spoon!”

***

A pretty blonde woman answers the door when Leslie rings the bell. 

“Hi! My name is Leslie Knope and this is my mother, Ms. Marlene Griggs-Knope.” She holds out the tray of brownies. “I helped make these for you.”

The woman accepts the tray with a smile. “Why thank you. I’m Julia Wyatt.This is so thoughtful of you. You are a very polite young lady.”

“I know. Thank you.”

The older women laugh. “How old are you, sweetheart? My kids will be starting school here on Monday and you might be in one of their classes.”

“I'm seven almost eight. I'm in Mrs. Belford’s second grade class.”

“Oh that's wonderful! That's the same class as Benji.” She calls out his name, and a few seconds later, and skinny, brown haired boy appears behind his mother. “Don't be shy, sweetheart. This is Leslie and her mother Ms. Griggs-Knope. Leslie will be in your class.”

Leslie smiles and waves, but he stays glued to his mother's side.

“Uhm, I've never moved before,” she tells him, “but it's probably really hard. If you want, you can come over my house and play. I have a lot of toys and a tire swing and tree house.”

That seems to pique the boy's interest, and he looks up at his mother.

“He's more than welcome to come over,” Marlene says. “We're just three houses down.”

“That sounds like fun, right Benji? You want to go play with Leslie.”

He nods and Leslie holds out her hand. “Come on! I'll show you how fast I can climb my tree.”

He stares at the hand before taking it slowly and following her down the street.

***

“Leslie,” Marlene sticks her head out of the back door, “Benji’s mother wants him home for dinner.”

The little boy hasn’t talked much, but that’s fine with Leslie. He seems to like her swing and tree house just fine, and he actually looks sad that he has to go home.

“I’ll see you at school on Monday,” Leslie tells him, and he nods. “Maybe we can ask Mrs. Belford if you can sit next to me! Stupid Jeremy sits next to me now and I don’t like him. I’d rather have a friend next to me.”

“I’m your friend?”

“Of course you are!”

“Oh, okay. Well, I better go. You have a cool house.” He pauses and pokes his tongue out through the gap in his teeth. “Thanks, Les--Lessie.”

He frowns when Leslie giggles, but she’s quick to reassure him. “It’s okay. I remember it was hard when I lost my teeth, too. I like it. That can be my super secret nickname that only you call me.”

He smiles again. “Okay. See you later.”

She waves as he runs back home.

***

His teeth have long grown in, but he still calls her Lessie when it’s just the two of them. She seems to like it, and he likes that it’s just  _ their _ thing.

Moving was hard at first. Leslie helped him make friends, but none of them were her. It scared him that she was so popular because he didn’t want to lose the only friend here he had, but he was the one she sat next to in class and at lunch, and he was the one she played with after school.

She calls him her best friend now, and despite the new friends he’s made, she’s his best friend, too.

***

They’re at the park in their neighborhood sitting in the lush grass when Leslie notices Ben pulling harder on the dandelions than necessary. 

“Are you okay? Why are you mad at the flowers?”

He shrugs. “You’re lucky. Your mom and dad like each other. All mine do is fight. Henry just leaves and goes to his friend’s house and I gotta make sure Stephie’s okay. She always cries when Mom and Dad fight.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I just thought that they wouldn’t fight anymore once we moved here, but it’s worse.”

She scoots over to sit next to him. “Let’s play a game instead. Let’s imagine that we’re grownups and on our own. I’ll go first. When I grow up, I’m gonna be the president and live in Washington D.C. in the White House. You can come visit me whenever you want because I’ll be the president and I said so. Do you know what you wanna be when you grow up?”

“I dunno. I like playing baseball. Maybe I’d do that. If you're gonna live in the White House, can I live in your tree house? I like it there. And I’ll eat candy for dinner and never have to hear my parents fight again.”

“If I’m the president, I’ll build you a super duper huge tree house in my new backyard and you can live there.”

“Cool!”

“You don’t think it’s weird that I want to be president?” Leslie asks, and Ben just cocks his head to the side, confused.

“Why would that be weird?”

“I dunno. Most people think it’s funny. There’s never been a girl president before and my mom says that sometimes it’s harder for girls to be taken seriously. Boys don’t always like it when girls are better at them at stuff.”

He pulls up another dandelion by the root. “That’s stupid. You’re better than me at a lot of things. You can run faster than me and climb trees better than me. You should be able to do whatever you want.”

“Yeah, you’re right. And you’re good at a lot of stuff, too. You always do better on math homework than me. If you get tired of playing baseball, you can come work for me in the White House.”

“Okay, that sounds neat.”

Leslie stands up and wipes the dirt from her pants. “Come on. My dad’s making his special spaghetti for dinner. You should come over.”

They race back to her house, and as usual, Leslie wins.

***

It’s raining outside, and Leslie’s finishing her diorama on the Wamapoke Tribe for class at the dining room table when the phone rings. Her mother answers, and speaks in low, worried tones.

“It’s okay. Calm down, Julia. I’m sure he’s fine. I’ll see if Leslie knows anything and I’ll call you right back.”

“Is Mrs. Wyatt okay?”  Leslie asks. 

“Leslie, this is very important. Benji ran out of the house today and no one knows where he is. His parents are very worried. Do you know where he is? Where he might be?”

Her eyes go wide and she shakes her head. “No. He ran away? Why? Is he okay?”

“We don’t know, sweetheart. We just want to find him. Are you sure you don’t know? Does he ever talk about a place where he likes to go? Maybe a place that he feels safe?”

She’s about to shake her head again, but stops. There’s the one place. His favorite place in the world.

Leslie gets up and runs into the yard, ignoring her mother or the rain that’s quickly soaking her skin. She climbs up the wooden planks nailed to the tree and pulls herself into the tree house.

Ben’s tucked into the corner, his knees tucked up to his chest, crying.

She runs over and hugs him. “Benji, you scared me! Everyone’s looking for you and you didn’t tell anyone where you went. That’s dangerous. Your mom and dad are worried.”

“No, they're not. They don’t care.”

“Sure they do. They love you.”

He lifts his head up and wipes at his eyes. “No, they don’t. If they loved me they wouldn’t fight all of the time. If they loved me, they wouldn’t be getting a divorce and my dad wouldn’t be moving back to Minnesota.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

“My dad’s leaving us. Why would he do that? If he loved us, he’d stay.”

Leslie sniffles and rests her head on Benji’s shoulder. “I don’t know. I can’t imagine if my daddy ever left, but I’m sure he still loves you. And your mom does, too. And Henry and Stephie and me.”

“You won’t leave me like my dad is, will you?”

“Nope, never.”

***

Marlene and Robert are at the table sipping their coffee and sharing the morning paper when Leslie runs in from outside, a lethargic Benji trailing behind.

“Hey, kids,” Robert smiles as they join them at the table, “how was your campout in the treehouse?”

“So fun, Daddy. We looked at the stars and heard the crickets, and Benji even peed outside!”

Marlene looked over at the poor boy who looked like he didn’t get an ounce of sleep. Leslie never did understand that not everyone has her sleep schedule.

“Did you have fun, Benji?” 

He nods with a yawn. “Yes, ma’am. It was fun. I’ve never slept outside before.”

“Can you believe that, Daddy?” Leslie asks. “But I told him we can sleep outside whenever we want this summer. It’s so fun!”

“I guess you’re excited for our camping trip next weekend, right?”

“Yeah! It’ll be so fun.”

Robert chuckles. “Good girl. And you’re gonna go visit your dad in Minnesota next weekend, right, Benji? That should be fun.”

The boy rubs his nose and lowers his head. “Uhm, I was s’posed to, but he’s really busy. Maybe sometime next month, my mom said.”

They’re not sure who’s more upset by the news, Benji or Leslie. 

“Then you can come camping with us! Please, Daddy, can Benji come with us. It’ll be so much fun. We go hiking and fishing and swimming and roast marshmallows. Oh, please, please, please, Daddy.”

“Of course he can,” her father laughs. “If Mrs. Wyatt says it’s okay and Benji wants to come, he’s more than welcome.”

The boy’s eyes widen. “Really? I can go?”

“If your mother is okay with it, I don’t see why not. I got plenty of extra gear for you. You been fishing before?”

“Yeah! We have a lake house and I’ve been fishing lots of times. I got one once, too.”

“Look at you. You’re a pro. I’ll go over today and talk to your mom about it. Sound good?”

The children nodded with twin smiles.

“Alright you outdoorsmen and woman,” Marlene says getting up from the table. “How about I make some breakfast. What do you want?”

The chorus of ‘waffles’ comes as no surprise.

***

It’s cloudy, and looks like it’s about to rain.

Benji’s not surprised, though. He thinks maybe the sun’s too sad to come out today, too.

He doesn’t care that he’s in his nice clothes when he climbs up into the tree house. All he cares about is finding Leslie.

She’s in a black dress, her mary jane shoes tucked under her legs. She’s crying, but it’s okay, because he cried, too.

He sits down beside her slowly. She almost acts like she can’t see him.

“I’m really sorry about your dad.”

She sobs even harder, and he doesn’t know what to do. That’s what his mom told him to say. 

“I didn’t mean to make you sadder. I’m sorry. I just want to help.”

“There’s nothing you can do,” she chokes out. “And I know why you’re here, and I’m not going. If I go and they bury him in the dirt that means he’s really gone.” She turns and throws herself into his arms. “I just want my Daddy back.”

Benji doesn’t care that she’s getting tears all over his scratchy suit or that he’s starting to cry, too. 

“I know. I wish he was back, too. ‘Specially once my dad moved away, he was always real nice to me and did things that my dad wasn’t around to do. But I don’t think he’s coming back. And my mom said that a funeral is when people come together and say really nice things and remember why they loved your dad. If he’s in heaven like people say, I think he might be real sad if you don’t go and say goodbye one last time.”

She pulls away and wipes her eyes. “Do you promise to stay with me and hold my hand the whole time?”

“If you want me to, I will.”

“Okay. I guess you’re right. I know my dad would be sad if I didn’t say goodbye.”

Benji stands up and pulls Leslie with him, but he stops when she tugs on his hand.

“Benji? You won’t leave me like my dad did, will you?”

“Nope, never.”

***

“What do you want to do first?” Leslie asks.

“I dunno.”

She rolls her eyes. “Ugh! Come on! This is our first time at the Harvest Festival by ourselves. We’re twelve years old. We’re practically adults. How much money do you have? I have some extra cash from babysitting.”

“I have plenty. My dad felt really guilty for not being able to come down for my birthday, so he sent me a card with a buttload of money. I have enough for tickets and food and games and anything.” He looks over at Leslie and smiles. “I’ll even share.”

“Gee, how thoughtful of you,” she giggles. “I say that we start with the big rides first because we all know how queasy you get if you go on them after we eat.” She pokes his stomach and he scowls. 

“Sure, go ahead and make fun of me and see if I win you a Li’l Sebastian doll this year.”

“Nevermind! I’m sorry. Speaking of which, I changed my mind. I want to go see him first.”

“Ugh, really? If we wait too long, the lines for the rides are gonna get ridiculous. Is a pony really worth it?”

“For the last time, Benjamin Wyatt, he’s a mini horse. You’ll never be a true Pawnean until you learn to appreciate him.”

He shrugs, but follows her to the pen because he follows her everywhere, it seems like. And he doesn’t mind it, not really. It’s just fun to watch her get upset. Plus, it’s worth it to see her get so excited.

After Li’l Sebastian, they ride all of the rides until their stomachs growl, and then split a funnel cake and corn dogs for lunch. 

It takes Benji seven tries, but he finally knocks down all of the cans and wins Leslie her doll.

“Yay! Thank you, Benji.”

“Of course. You can add that to your collection.”

They ride the Ferris Wheel when it’s dark outside and the fireworks are going off in the field next door. He looks over at her, and the moonlight makes her look really nice. 

He’s not sure what that feeling is in his stomach or why he wonders what it would be like to kiss her.

***

She’s running for sixth grade class president, and she makes Benji her campaign manager. He helps make flyers and hands them out, and everytime she sees her pin attached to his backpack, she smiles.

They have a table setup where she’s giving away “Vote for Leslie” brownies, and Benji’s standing with her when Derek comes up and takes one.

“Make sure to vote for me!” Leslie says with a smile, but he only scoffs, shoving the whole piece into his mouth.

“Yeah, when hell freezes over, Knope.”

She feels Benji stiffen beside her. “Hey, if you’re gonna be like that then you can leave. She doesn’t need your vote anyway.”

“Right, like I’d ever vote for that bitch.”

She sees Benji’s jaw clench. “What did you just call her?”

“Benji, it’s okay. He’s just being a jerk. Ignore him. We can tell a teacher or something-”

“I called her a bitch. What are you gonna do about it?”

Before Leslie knows what’s happening, Benji’s fist flies across the table and hits Derek square in the nose.

His face falls as quickly as Derek does.

“I’m so sorry,” he says to her, not Derek. “It just happened. I don’t know what came over me, I--”

He grimaces when she tries to touch his hand, and while she’s really worried about him, she thinks it’s all kind of awesome, too. And she wants to just...do  _ something _ to him. 

“No, it’s okay. I think your hand is really hurt. Let’s see if we can find some ice or something.”

They hide out in a broom closet, an ice pack on Ben’s hand. They know they’re going to be found out eventually, and Benji will probably get into serious trouble.

“I’m really sorry, Leslie.”

“What are you apologizing to me for?”

“Because I might have really hurt your chances with the election.”

She flips the ice pack over. “Are you serious? That was awesome. He was being a jerk. And you didn’t ruin anything. This is middle school. You think now people won’t know that  _ I’m  _ the one whose campaign manager punched stupid Derek in the nose? You might have won this thing for me yourself.”

That draws a smile from him, but his face soon turns serious again. “You know I’d punch a million people in the face for you, don’t you?”

Her stomach’s doing weird somersaults again. 

“Yeah, I know.”

***

Julia Wyatt is folding laundry in the living room when her youngest son flops down on the couch.

“Hey, Mom?”

“Yeah, honey?”

“When I grow up, I’m gonna marry Leslie.”

She chuckles. “You are? Well, is she aware of this?”

“Not yet. It’s weird now if I tell her. Maybe when we’re older.”

“What if she doesn’t want to marry you?”

He sits up and looks at her with furrowed brows. “Huh, I guess I hadn’t thought about that.”

“That’s a pretty big thing to overlook. Besides, I think you’re a little young to think about something like marriage.”

“I guess, but I have a plan. We’ll get married after college or something and then move into her treehouse. We’ll work and do other grown up stuff like eat whatever we want for dinner. Then Leslie’s gonna become the president. She was gonna let me have my very own treehouse in the yard, but if we’re married we can just both live in the White House.”

She sits next to him and ruffles his hair. “While I admire that you’ve obviously thought this out, I still think you should wait a looong time before you think about marriage. You both still have a lot of growing up to do. By the time you’re old enough to fall in love and get married, you and Leslie might have drifted apart, or you have those special kinds of feelings for other people. You don’t know what can happen.”

“Okay, I’ll wait. But I think you’re wrong. Me and Leslie are always going to be best friends.”

“Well, I hope that’s true.” She pats his leg before going back to the laundry. “Leslie’s a wonderful person to have in your life, unlike that no good father of yours--”

Benji rolls his eyes and covers his ears.

***

“Do you really have to go?”

Benji sighs. “Yeah, I don’t think I have a choice.”

“But this is the summer before high school. You can’t spend it in stupid Minnesota with your dad. There’s so much stuff we’re supposed to do.”

“I know, and I really wish I wasn’t going, but it’s a big deal for him, apparently. Wants to bond with me or whatever before I go off to high school. Something in there about being a man. I don’t know, It’s stupid.”

She rests her head on his shoulder. “But you’re leaving tomorrow. I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you, too. But we can still talk on the phone and stuff. My dad's gonna be working some days, so I’ll be bored out of my mind.”

“Okay. But don’t go making any new best friends while you’re there, okay?”

“As if anyone could replace you.”

“True, I am pretty amazing. It just sucks. High school is gonna be weird and different and you’ll barely be back in Pawnee a week before we start. That’s not enough time.”

“It’ll be fine. Nothing’s gonna change.”

“You promise?”

He links his pinky with her. “I pinky promise. We’ll be best friends forever and me being away with my dad or us starting high school isn’t gonna change that.”

“Well, since you pinky promise… I guess it won’t be the end of the world. And I don’t care how far away you are, if  _ Empire Strikes Back _ is on, I’m calling you.”

“I wouldn’t expect anything less. Come on,” he stands up and pulls her with him. “Let’s go to the park. That always makes you feel better when you’re sad.”

“You know me well.”

“I do. I’m a good best friend.” He quickly drops her hand, and sprints off. “Race ya!”

She laughs and chases after him. “You jerk!”

And just this once, she lets him win.


	2. Freshman Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leslie and Ben do their best to survive their freshman year of high school and not lose each other in the process.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I decided to continue the story! These next chapters will focus on Leslie and Ben's relationship through each year of high school.

Benji comes back home a week before school starts.

It wasn’t the worst summer of Leslie’s life. She still had other friends besides Benji, and she definitely made the best out of her last few months before high school, but it still wasn’t the same.

She honestly couldn’t remember what the summers were like before him. The days spent out in her tree house or in the park. Taking turns watching tv on each other’s couches while their parents were at work.

There were mornings when she woke up thinking about what she and Benji were going to do that day, only to remember that he was several hundred miles away.

It sucked.

They talked on the phone every day at first, but then it just...dwindled. He was off doing things with his dad and Leslie was a junior counselor at some of the summer day camps in the park. Things got so busy, but that didn’t make her miss him any less.

But he’s coming home today, and Leslie is a ball of excited energy.

She’s sitting in the Wyatt’s kitchen with Stephanie, probably the only other person as excited to see Benji as Leslie is, and she’s more than grateful that Mrs. Wyatt had invited her over.

“I know Benji will be excited to see you,” she had said to her last week with a chuckle. “You might as well just come over by the house, otherwise he’ll just go find you anyway. Save everyone the time.”

“You must be so excited to start high school,” Steph says. “I bet it will be so cool and have so many awesome people. I think middle school will be okay, I guess. It’s a little scary.”

“Aww, don’t be scared.” Leslie smiles at Steph. “It’ll be fun. A whole new experience and adventure. And if you ever need help with anything or have questions, you know can come to me.”

“Really?”

“Of course. Except for math. We’ll let Benji take care of that.”

Steph giggles, and it turns into a scream of delight when the key turns in the lock and Benji walks through the door.

He drops his bag just in time for Steph to run into him and give him a tight hug.

“Hey, Steph. I guess you missed me?” he laughs and wraps his arms around his sister.

Leslie stands, but she’s frozen in her place. She hasn’t seen Benji in months, and now he’s right there in front of her.

It looks like he’s grown an inch or two, and there’s something about his features that just looks...different.

Benji catches Leslie’s eyes over his sister’s head, and she has no idea why her stomach does somersaults when his smile gets even wider.

“Hey, Steph? Think you can let me go for a little bit so I can say hi to Leslie?”

Everyone laughs when she says no, but eventually gives up her hold on her brother.

Benji stuffs his hands into his pockets and walks towards her since apparently her feet don’t know how to work anymore.

“Hey.”

“Hi,” she manages to choke out. “It’s, uhm, it’s good to see you. I’m glad you’re home.”

“Yeah, it’s good to see you, too. Glad to be home.”

She wants to hug him, but she doesn’t. She’s not sure why, either. Hugs are nothing new between them after so many years of friendship, but for some reason she can’t bring herself to do it.

And neither can he, apparently. 

“Alright,” Mrs. Wyatt says coming up behind them. “It’s about time for Benji’s welcome home dinner. Why don’t you guys go set the table.”

Leslie blinks and nods at Mrs. Wyatt, going to the drawer with the placemats like it’s second nature. Maybe because it is. She’s eaten as many meals here as she has in her own house, it feels like.

She eats calzones that night and never once makes a joke.

~~~~~

“Ugh, this sucks,” Benji says as he looks down at their schedules. “We hardly have any classes together.”

“That’s probably because  _ someone _ is taking all of the ridiculous math classes.”

She cackles and pokes his arm, and Benji isn’t sure why that gives him goosebumps. 

“At least we have English and history together.”

“I call dibs on you for all partner projects.”

Benji laughs. “Good. Saves me from having to call dibs on you.”

She smiles again, and that weird feeling is back. The one that he had when he first came home and saw Leslie standing there. He didn’t know what it was, and he honestly wasn’t sure if he liked it or not.

“You still want to do model UN, right?”

“Yup, and then baseball in the spring.”

“That’ll be fun.”

“What about you? Are you going to play softball?”

Leslie sighs and shakes her head. “I don’t think so. I think I peaked in Little League. I was a trailblazer for young girls everywhere, but I think I’m good for now.”

“But...you’ll come to the games right. I mean, if I make the team.”

“First of all, you’ll definitely make the team. And of course I will. Wouldn’t miss them for anything in the world.”

He didn’t realize how nervous he was until she answered. Like for those few seconds he didn’t expect her to say yes. 

The bell rings loudly, summoning them to their first period of the day. “I guess I’ll see you in history?” Ben asks, and Leslie nods. 

“Yup! Whoever gets there first has to save the other a seat. Deal?”

“Deal.”

~~~~~

Leslie doesn’t think she’s ever been this busy in her life.

High school is hard, but the good kind of hard. Her classes are interesting--some more than others--and she’s involved in some extracurricular activity almost everyday after school.  

She’s been making so many new friends, too, and before she even realizes it, the first half of the year is almost over.

She’s at her locker when there’s a shadow beside her, making her look up.

“Hey, Leslie.”

“Oh, hey, Benji--Ben. Sorry.”

He’s  _ Ben _ now, which sounds so foreign to her ears.

He smirks and shakes his head. “Don’t worry about it. You’re one of the few people still allowed to call me that.”

She raises her eyebrow. “Is that so? Why the sudden name change?”

“Felt like it was time,” Ben says with a shrug. “New school, new people, new teachers. Figured this was the best time to change it. Benji sounds a bit too kiddish, now.”

She doesn’t agree. 

“Okay, if you say so. It’ll be a tough habit to break, but I’ll do it for you. So, what can I do for you, _Ben_ ?”

“Well,  _ Leslie _ , I was just gonna ask if you wanted to work on the history presentation tonight. Get it out of the way early.”

“Uhm, yeah that sounds good. If you want, you can come over to my house. It feels like forever since you’ve been there. And my mom’s making her meatloaf tonight…”

“Say no more. I’ll be there.”

“Yo, Ben!” someone calls from behind him, and he turns. 

“Coming. I gotta go,” he says to Leslie, “but I’ll be over tonight. Around six?”

“Perfect.”

As she watches him join his group of friends, her heart aches for the days when she was the one he walked to class with everyday.

~~~~~

Ben leans back against the chair at Leslie’s dining room table with a sigh.

“Okay, I think that should be good. I present to you the Roman Empire at the height of its power.”

A huge piece of posterboard is spread out on the table with an “exceptionally accurate and to scale” map drawn on it. 

“Yeah, we’re getting an A on this project for sure,” Leslie agrees. “Ugh, wait, there’s a part that isn’t filled in right.”

She reaches across the table, the back of her head right in front of him. He gets a whiff of something fruity. He thinks it’s her shampoo. 

It’s different than what she used to use, and he wonders how long it’s been since she switched.

“How’s it going, you two?” Marlene asks as she walks into the room.

“Good!” Leslie says, moving back to her seat. “We’re pretty much done with the map. We just have to practice the actual presentation, but it’s not due for another few weeks.”

“Good, so you can call it quits. It’s a school night, and Benji should be getting home.”

“It’s  _ Ben _ now, Mom,” Leslie corrects with a smirk.

“It’s fine, Ms. Griggs-Knope. Benji, still works.”

Marlene smiles a pats Ben on the shoulder. “You’re a good boy. It’s been too long since you’ve been over. Don’t be a stranger.” 

Ben smiles. “I’ll try not to.”

“Alright, well, have fun finishing your project. I’m headed upstairs. It was good to see you, Benji.”

“Good to see you, too. Thanks again for dinner.”

“Anytime.”

Leslie’s putting away her markers and colored pencils, and he can’t help but watch her. He’s not sure why, either. They’ve done this a million times before, but it feels different somehow.

“So,” Ben says slowly, “uh, how are things?”

She looks up with a furrowed brow. “Things?”

“Yeah, you know. Stuff. Life. All that. We haven’t really  _ talked _ talked in awhile.”

Her eyes go wide at his question, like she’s surprised he’s even asking, and he’s not sure why that makes him feel so terrible. “Uhm, it’s good. You know, staying busy with clubs and stuff. Uh, what about you?”

“Same. You know, nothing too interesting or exciting.”

The silence that follows is painful. 

“Well, yeah, anyway,” he says, gathering his things into his backpack, “thanks for letting me come over and work on this. I better get home.”

Leslie blinks and it takes her a second to move. “Oh, yeah, right. Of course.” She follows him out to the front door. “Well, have a good night. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Right. Tomorrow.”

He walks the few yards to his door, looking back to see that Leslie was still on her porch watching him. He waves just before slipping his key in the lock, and she waves back.

Ben wonders when it was that they stopped hugging each other goodbye.

~~~~~

“Crap,” she mutters to herself. “Crap crap crap on a turd.”

Her scrapbooking club meeting ran over and she’s stuffing supplies into her bag as she runs out back to the fields.

It was Ben’s first baseball game, and she’d promised she’d be there.

As she had predicted, Ben made the JV team easily, and as the starting shortstop, no less.

She’s out of breath by the time she reaches the bleachers, finding Steph and Mrs. Wyatt in the crowd.

“Sorry, I’m late. Did I miss anything?”

“Don’t worry, sweetheart,” Mrs. Wyatt says with a smile. “They just got out on the field.”

She peeks over the rows of heads towards the field to look for Ben. He’s warming up, catching ground balls and throwing them to first base, but between every practice play, he scans the crowd.

Leslie’s heart almost feels like it’s exploding when he catches her eye and his face breaks out into a smile. She gives him a small wave that he tries to return just as a ball whizzes past him.

“Nice one, Wyatt,” one of his teammates teases, and Leslie can tell he’s hiding a blush. With one last look in her direction, Ben goes back to practicing before the umpire starts the game.

After nine long innings, Ben makes the play that seals them their first win of the season.

Leslie just might be the loudest person cheering as Ben’s teammates surround him and whoop in victory.

Later, when he’s still smiling and receiving pats on his back, Leslie runs over and hugs him.

It’s the first hug they’ve shared in almost a year, and she almost forgot how great it felt.

“Congratulations! I’m so proud of you.”

“You came,” is all he responds. 

“Of course I did! Your first big high school game? I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“Ben!” one of his teammates calls out. “Coach is gonna take us out for a victory dinner. You get to pick.”

“Coming!” He looks back over to her, rubbing the back of his neck. “I gotta go. But I’m really happy that you came.”

Another player, the first baseman she thinks, crashes into Ben and ruffles his hair. “Come on, man. Let’s go celebrate.”

As Ben’s being pulled away, he gives her an apologetic smile, but she waves him off.

“I’m happy I came, too,” she whispers, and turns to walk home.

~~~~~

He’s spending the summer with his father again.

It’s the best arrangement given the circumstances. At least, that’s what everyone tells him.

Henry lives with their dad, Steph chose to stay with Mom, and as usual, he’s the one that gets floated back and forth just to keep the peace.

Ben’s mowing the lawn one last time before he goes when Leslie walks past the house on her way home.

“Hey,” he calls out, and she looks up at him surprised.

Ben’s not sure what’s worse, that she was going to walk by without saying anything or that the fact that he  _ did _ surprised her so much.

“Oh, hey.”

“So, uh, what are you up to?”

“Going home. Just signed up again to be a counselor at the day camps for the Parks Department. What about you?”

“Mowing the lawn one last time for my mom before I leave for Minnesota.”

“Oh, that’s right. I forgot you were going back for the summer.”

He honestly doesn’t remember telling her, either, which also doesn’t feel right. 

“Yeah, I guess we haven’t talked much lately.”

“No, we haven’t.”

He hates this. The awkward silences between them like they’re strangers, but he just doesn’t know how to fix it.

“Anyway,” she she says, “I’ll let you get back to your chores. When do you leave?”

“Day after tomorrow.”

She nods slowly and takes a deep breath. “Okay. Hopefully I’ll get to say goodbye.”

“Yeah.”

With one more nod, Leslie starts walking again, but he just can’t let her go. Not now. “Hey, wait, Leslie?”

She stops and turns around slowly. “Yeah?”

“So,  _ The Empire Strikes Back _ is on tonight. You wanna come over and watch it? It’s been a while.”

She smiles, but it looks almost sad. “Yeah, it has been. That’ll be nice. I’d like that.”

“Awesome! Yeah, just come on over tonight, okay?”

“Okay.”

She falls asleep almost halfway through the film, her head eventually resting against Ben’s shoulder. 

She’ll end up jerking awake when Vader cuts off Luke’s hand, shocked and embarrassed and muttering something about how she has to go home.

But for now, he just enjoys having her close to him again. 

“I’m gonna miss you,” he whispers to her as she sleeps, but she doesn’t hear him. Not like he was expecting her to, anyway. He just smiles when she sighs and moves a little closer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keep an eye out for Sophomore year coming soon!


	3. Sophomore Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben doesn’t call once. Not a single time all summer.

Ben doesn’t call once. Not a single time all summer. 

Leslie tries not to get upset about it. It’s not like she  _ needs _ him or anything. She’s been having fun without him. She has other friends--great friends, and between volunteering at the different camps and various babysitting jobs, she hardly has the time to miss him.

But she still does.

She picks up the phone half a dozen times to call, but she just can’t bring herself to do it.

And because of that, she’s not sure if she hates Ben or herself more.

~~~~~

Leslie doesn’t call once. Not a single time all summer.

He has a decent enough time hanging out with his brother and reconnecting with a few old friends from before he moved to Pawnee. His dad takes them out to the lake house for a few days to fish, and it feels nice to not have to worry about school or baseball or anything else.

And it’s fine until it isn’t. Until something reminds him of her and all he can think about is how much he misses talking to her.

He’s lost count of the number of times he’s almost called her, but he doesn’t. He’s not sure why, either, and that confuses him even more.

He hates it.

~~~~~

On the first day of school, Leslie walks past Ben’s house just as he’s leaving. There’s something inside of her that tells her to speed up, to walk right past him, but for once, she ignores it.

“Hey,” she says instead, stopping at the end of the driveway. 

“Hey.”

“Glad you got back from Minnesota okay.”

He nods and takes a bite from the toast in his hand. “Thanks. I was a little surprised that you weren’t around when I came home.”

She shrugs. “I was surprised you didn’t stop by when you came home. Plus, I didn’t know  _ when  _ you were coming home because you didn’t tell me.”

Ok, so she’s more than a little mad, but it at least looks like he feels bad about it.

“Yeah, sorry about that.”

“It’s fine.”

It’s not, and he can tell it’s not, but she’s just too tired to be angry about it anymore.

“You wanna walk together? It’s a first day of school tradition.”

She snorts and raises her eyebrows. “It is?”

“Technically. We did last year.”

Like last time he came home, she notices how much he’s changed. He’s taller than her now, and his voice is so much deeper than she remembers.

His jaw is more defined and strong, and it makes him look...handsome.

_ Whoa. _

“Yeah, sure,” she answers, shaking those other thoughts from her head.

“So, how was your summer?” he asks as they walk.

“It was good. Busy, but good. Yours?”

“The same.”

“Good.”

They don’t say another word.

~~~~~

Ben’s at his locker when he feels the tap on his shoulder.

“Hey, Ben.”

“Leslie? Hey, what’s up?”

“Uh, not much. Wow, it feels like we haven’t talked in forever.”

“Yeah,” he nods. “Yeah, it has. That’s what happens when we get screwed over and don’t share any classes.”

“Right.” She bites her lip and hands an envelope over to him. “Anyway, I just wanted to give you this. It’s an invite to my Sweet Sixteen. You know, becoming a woman and all that. It should be fun and there’ll be dancing and food and lots of other great stuff. You should come. I mean, if you want to. No pressure, I just--”

“Leslie, of course I’ll be there. I would love to come.”

Damn, he’s missed making her smile like that. 

“Awesome! Okay, I’ll see you then. Well, probably before then since we go to the same school and live on the same street and everything. But yeah, definitely then.”

He goes because there is honestly no where else he’d rather be. It’s at the rec center, the room filled with decorations and tables with food and drinks. The lights are low and there’s music playing in the background.

When he walks in, he sees her immediately. Her hair is pulled up away from her face, and she’s wearing a blue dress that matches her eyes perfectly. 

She looks...beautiful.

Ben might be dense, but he’s not that dense. He’s noticed how after every summer she looks more and more grown up. He noticed that her cheeks aren’t as round, and what she’s lost in her face, she’s gained in--other places. Awesome places.

He definitely noticed that she has boobs. 

He shoves his hands into his pockets, one feeling the wrapped present he has stuffed there.

Again, like she knows that he’s watching, she catches his eye and smiles.

“Ben, hey!” she says, running over to him. “I’m so happy that you came.”

“Of course. I told you that I wouldn’t miss it. Happy birthday, by the way.”

“Thanks. Yeah, sixteen doesn’t feel all that different, honestly. Except for the license. That’s very cool. Now I just have to wait until I can afford a car to actually use it regularly.”

“Yeah,” Ben laughs and shuffles his feet. “Oh! Uhm, here,” he digs the gift out of his pocket. “This is for you. I know I could have just put it on the table, but it’s kind of special.”

Her eyes go wide with excitement. She loves presents.

“Can I open it now?”

“Sure. You’re the birthday girl.”

She rips off the paper eagerly, and he has flashbacks to her tenth birthday party. She still makes the same face.

She lifts the lid to the small, necklace box and gasps. “Ben,” she whispers, pulling out the locket. “It’s beautiful.”

“Open it.”

He doesn’t mean to make her cry, but it still happens. “Ben, it’s me and my dad.”

“Yeah. Remember when I was obsessed with photography for like a week back when we were kids? I found all of the pictures I took not too long ago, and this was one of them. I hope it’s okay.”

She stares at the picture and sniffs. “It’s perfect. Thank you. Seriously, this is the best gift I’ve ever gotten.” She lightly brushes her thumb across the picture of her father’s face. “Can you help me put it on?”

“Right now?”

“Yeah.”

She hands over the locket and turns around, her perfect, pale neck right there in front of him.

His hands are shaking, and it’s a few tries before he can close the clasp, but he does.

She turns, and it takes him a while to get over the shock of her hugging him again.

“Thank you. For everything.”

“Anytime.”

“Well, she says taking a deep breath, “I should probably go back and mingle with the rest of my guests.” She wipes at her eyes. “I look like a mess now, don’t I?”

“No. You look--” amazing, beautiful, perfect-- “good. You look good.”

She wears that locket countless times over the next several months, and every time he notices, he smiles. 

~~~~~

Leslie loves sleepovers. She loves time with her friends and the baking and pedicures and makeovers.

And the high school gossip. 

It’s always little things, nothing damaging or ruthless. Who’s dating who. Who has a crush on who. What they  _ really _ think the Tuesday mystery meat is made out of. Stupid little things like that.

So she was definitely not prepared for what happens next.

“So, Leslie,” Lexi asks with a smile, “you’re neighbors with Ben Wyatt, aren’t you?”

“Yeah, what about it?”

“You’re friends, right?”

Leslie shrugs and eats a bite of her brownie. “I guess. We’ve been friends since we were like, eight.”

“And you two never…”

“Never what?”

“Oh come on,” Chrissy jumps in. “Don’t pretend to be so clueless. He’s cute! Have you two ever had anything? Do you  _ like _ him.”

Leslie nearly chokes on a walnut. “Wait, what? Ben? Are you seriously asking me this right now?”

“Hmmm, notice how she doesn’t answer the question,” Lexi teases. 

“Because it’s ridiculous. He’s like a brother or weird distant cousin or something. I don’t  _ like _ him.”

She doesn’t, right? 

The weird feelings that she gets when she sees him are totally normal. And the butterflies and the shaking hands. And she  _ totally _ doesn’t constantly think about how Ben’s fingers brushed against her neck at her birthday party when he put on her necklace.

Nope, gross. Ben is...Ben. 

“Well, that’s good,” Sarah says. “Because if you did, I would have told you that you’ll need to fight Allison J. for him. I heard her talking in the locker room about how she and Ben hooked up last Friday after the pep rally.”

Okay, so the ball of anger in her belly is totally normal, right?

“That’s such bull,” Leslie blurts out.

“Oh yeah, she’s not jealous at all,” Sarah laughs. 

“I’m not jealous. I just know that she’s full of shit. Ben was with me Friday night after the pep rally.” At her friend’s raised eyebrows, she groans. “I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant that we left the pep rally together. At the same time. And we walked home together since, you know, we’re neighbors. His sister invited me to stay for dinner and I was there late. So unless he snuck out past curfew in the middle of the night without anyone noticing, Allison is talking out of her ass. Besides, she was totally hitting on him and he blew her off.”

Sarah, Chrissy, and Lexi all exchange looks before bursting out into laughter. 

“Yeah,” Lexi says, “Allison’s full of shit.”

“See, I’m  _ not _ jealous. She’s just a liar.”

Soon enough, they forget all about that and move on to the next bit of high school drama.

And Leslie pretends that the idea of that rumor  _ actually _ being true doesn’t make her die a little inside.

~~~~~

Ben made the Varsity team his Sophomore year, one of only two other underclassman to do so. He knows he’s going to be a glorified benchwarmer until he gets better, but he’s still thrilled. 

He misses his old teammates though. The varsity guys...well, most of them are stereotypical jerks. 

He’s changing in the locker room after practice, trying to ignore the douchebag pitcher’s voice. Ben doesn’t care about who that guy’s sleeping with., and he’s positive the girls Zack’s talking about wouldn't appreciate what he’s saying, either.

“What about you, Wyatt?” Zack asks. 

“Huh?”

“Who’s been getting that dick wet? Underclassmen chicks love a varsity guy.”

Good Lord, what a Grade A asshole.

“I don’t kiss and tell.”

A few of the other guys bark out a laugh. 

“Cute,” Zack smirks. “But I think I can guess. Who’s that blonde you’re hanging around. Leah something?”

“Leslie?”

“Yeah, that one.”

“No, we’re just friends. We’ve been friends since we were kids.”

“She shoot you down or something? She looks like a prude. Always doing those fundraisers and shit. I don’t know, you should go after that. She needs to loosen up and get her cherry popped.”

Ben stands up and clenches his jaw.  “Stop talking about her like that.”

“Awww, Benny’s upset. Well, if you won’t grow a pair, maybe I’ll check her out. I’m telling you, even a girl like her can be easy if you know what to do. What do you think, Ben? Think she’ll come out to a party with me? Get a few drinks in ‘em and they spread their legs--”

“I said shut up,” he yells, and Zack gets into his face.

“Or what? What’s a scrawny little prick like you gonna do about it? If I wanna fuck that stuck up little bitch, then--”

All Ben sees is red and his fist comes whirling from his right side.

It’s not like punching Derek in the sixth grade because he didn’t punch back.

No, Zack isn’t as kind, and it takes four other guys to pull them away from one another.

He’s sitting outside of the nurse’s office with an icepack to his eye when Leslie comes running.

“Ben! Oh my God, are you okay?!”

“Leslie, what are you doing here?”

“I was staying late working on some stuff for the history club when I heard that there was a fight. A fight that  _ you  _ were in. Of course I’m here. How do you feel? What happened?”

“It’s okay, I’m fine. Just--don’t worry about it.”

He can tell that her hands are just aching to touch him, but she doesn’t. “How can you expect me to not worry. He’s twice your size, Ben. He could have seriously hurt you.”

“Well, he’s an asshole.”

“Yeah, I know that. He’s the absolute worst, but you should know better. You got suspended from your first game of the season. He’s not worth it.”

No, he’s not, but she is. She’ll always be worth it.

“I know. It was stupid, and he was saying some really shitty stuff. I just...I lost it.”

“What did he say?”

He sighs and shakes his head. She doesn’t need to know.

“Don’t worry about it. I’m fine and hopefully he’ll know not to do what he did again.”

Leslie bites her lip but doesn’t ask anymore questions. She just takes a seat beside him. “Okay, but I’m gonna stay here with you until the nurse clears you to go home.”

“Don’t you have to finish--”

“It’s fine. None of that’s more important than making sure you don’t, I don't know, die on your way back home. Concussions can be dangerous, Ben.”

They sit side by side in relative silence until the door opens, and Zack comes walking out with a swollen lip and tape on his nose. He gives the pair of them the most hateful look Ben’s ever seen.

“Sorry,” Ben whispers once he’s sure Zack’s out of earshot. “I think him seeing you here just got you added to his shit list.”

“Screw him. As if I care what he thinks. If you punched him, he probably deserved it.”

“He did.”

“Are you ever going to tell me what really happened?”

He wants to, but he just can’t. Not now, maybe not ever. 

“Maybe someday.” He tries to smile but it hurts too much.

“Ben! You can’t do those stupid smirks right now. You’ll make things worse.”

“Sorry. Are you really going to sit with me this entire time. It might be a while.”

She lightly nudges his shoulder. “Of course. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

He hopes the ice pack is big enough to cover his smile. 


	4. Junior Year

Leslie isn’t angry that Ben doesn’t call that summer because she never once expects him to. 

He got a girlfriend at the end of sophomore year. Jessica, a gorgeous, brunette cheerleader with several inches on Leslie in both height and bust size.

Not that she hates Jessica for her looks or thinks Ben’s shallow. No. It’s not that, and she’s  _ definitely  _ not jealous.

What can she be jealous of? It’s not like Jessica stole away her best friend. It felt like she and Ben were barely friends anymore anyway, so it couldn’t be that.

No, that feeling that stopped her from saying goodbye when she saw Jessica and Ben kissing in his driveway wasn’t jealousy at all.   

It’s Jessica that he probably calls all of the time. It’s Jessica that now gets invited over by Mrs. Wyatt to be there when Ben comes home.

She doesn’t hate Jessica, but sometimes she really wants to.

Leslie can’t face Ben after that. 

On the first day of Junior year, she tries to leave early and go past Ben’s house without him noticing, but he’s already standing at the end of his driveway waiting.

Fuck.

“Hey, Leslie.”

“Hi.” 

“You weren’t thinking of breaking our first day of school tradition, were you?”

She shrugs and keeps walking as Ben joins her. “I didn’t know if traditions end when one or both of us aren’t single.”

Something strange flashes across his face, but it’s gone almost as quickly as it came. 

“Why would that make a difference?”

“I don’t know. I figured you’d want to walk with her instead.”

“She lives on the other side of town.”

“Oh,” Leslie huffs, “so I’m just more convenient. That’s nice.”

“What? No, that’s not what I meant. Look, are you okay? Did I do something? I feel like you’ve been mad at me. We haven’t really talked--”

“No, we haven’t. But last time I checked, it takes two people to do that. I just figured you were busy with Jessica.”

“Dating someone doesn’t mean they have to take up all of my time.”

“Well, I wouldn’t know, would I? No one around seems to think I’m good enough girlfriend material.”

He stops walking and grabs her arm. “Hey, that’s not true.”

“It’s--” She stops and takes a deep breath. “It’s fine. Can we just not talk about it?”

She keeps walking, and it takes a few steps before Ben can catch back up. “Okay, fine.”

“Fine.”

They reach the school,  and Leslie can’t wait to not be around him anymore.

“I gotta go.” She rushes past him before he can say another word.

Unlike last year, this year she’s relieved that they have no classes together. 

For the next few weeks, Leslie uses her extra “Ben sense” to actively avoid him.

And Jessica. 

Because he’s always with her. His arm might permanently fuse to her shoulders with the amount of time it spends hanging over them. Ugh, and she’s always wearing his varsity jacket like she doesn’t have coats of her own to wear.

But she’s definitely not jealous. Nope, not one bit.

~~~~~

One thing Ben will say about small towns surrounded by corn is that once the leaves start to change and the weather gets cold, the best thing that comes of it are the bonfires.

His hands are shoved into the pockets of his Varsity jacket when he arrives at the field, someone handing him a beer from one of the coolers scattered around.

He recognizes most of the faces here, but there’s one that stands out. She always stands out.

She’s on the other side of the fire, the orange and yellow flames making her look like she’s glowing even more than usual. Ben shouldn’t interrupt her when she’s talking to one of her friends, but he feels like he  _ has _ to. She’s been avoiding him like the plague, and there just so happens to be an empty seat on the log next her. 

It won’t be so easy for her to run away this time.

She almost doesn’t notice him until he’s right there beside her, and it’s not even her that acknowledges him first.

“Hey, Ben,” Leslie’s friend Sarah says with a smile.

“Hey, Sarah. Leslie. How are you guys?”

“I’m great, thanks,” Sarah answers. 

It takes Leslie a little bit longer. “Good. Uh, what about you?”

“Doing pretty good.”

Sarah can tell there’s a tension there that just doesn’t belong, and Ben’s beyond grateful when she takes a hint.

“Well, I’m gonna go grab another drink and mingle,” Sarah says. “I’ll see you around.”

Leslie keeps her body angled towards Sarah’s now empty seat.

“So, where’s Jessica?” she asks with more than a hint of bite. 

“Uhm, I wouldn’t know. We broke up.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

And she sounds like she actually means it, which makes no sense. He thought she hated Jessica.

“It’s okay. It was bound to happen. I’m over it.”

“Oh, well, that’s good.”

“I guess. So what have you been up to lately?”

She shrugs, but at least she turns to face him just a little bit more. He’ll take it.

“The same. Clubs and volunteering and stuff. Always busy.”

“Yeah, but you love it. I know you do.”

That pulls a little smile from her. “True. That much hasn’t changed.”

“No, but a lot of other things have.”

“That’s what happens, right? As you get older and stuff. Things are supposed to change.”

She doesn’t sound too convinced. 

“Yeah, I guess they are. Doesn’t mean we have to always like it though, right?”

“No, we don’t.”

God, when did things just get so damn awkward between them? When did they turn into complete strangers?

“So, have you started looking into colleges yet?”

Her eyes brighten a little bit. “Yeah! I have a few different top choices, but I really just want to go to IU for history. It’s far enough away, but not too far. I don’t think I could ever be too far away from Pawnee.”

“Still gonna be president someday?”

He makes her smile, a real one this time, and he almost forgot what that was like. “You know it. What about you? Have your career goals changed much since we were kids? Still planning on living in a treehouse behind the White House?”

“Thankfully, no,” he says with a nudge to her shoulder. “Although, that gig did sound pretty sweet. But I do want to still do something math related. Maybe accounting? I don’t know, yet. But I’m a little torn between going to school up in Minnesota or closer to here.”

“You should stay here,” Leslie says and then quickly bites her lip. “I mean, IU has a pretty good accounting program, and I think you’d do well there.”

Ben takes a sip of his beer. “Yeah, maybe I will. I’ll look into it more for sure.”

“Good. Then once I’m president, you could me my chief financial adviser or something. I don’t know, we’ll make something work.”

“Sounds like a plan to me.”

Leslie shivers, and Ben notices that the light sweater she’s wearing is doing little to combat the dropping temperature despite the fire burning only a few feet away.

“Here,” he says, taking off his jacket. “You must be freezing.”

“No, I’ll be fine,” she tries to protest, but Ben doesn’t listen. 

“Take it, please. I’ve still got that Minnesota blood in me. This isn’t even close to cold for me.”

He drapes it over her shoulders, and the sight of Leslie in his varsity jacket makes him feel things that he never felt with Jessica. 

She wraps it tightly around her. “Thanks.”

“Anytime.”

He notices when Leslie shifts just a little closer to him, and he feels this indescribable warming in his chest. If he were to move his knee just a little, they’d be touching.

The temptation is strong, and just when he thinks he’ll do it, Leslie stands up.

“Uhm, I’m gonna go get another beer.”

“Oh, I can get you one. I was just about to--”

“No, it’s okay.” She puts out her hand to prevent him from standing up. “I can get it. I’ll be right back.”

His eyes follow her as she walks to a cooler, a surge of pride whenever he sees the curious glances in her direction as she wears his jacket. 

It’s primal and possessive, and honestly, Leslie would probably punch him square in the jaw if she knew. 

She’s on her way back when someone stops her.

No, it’s not just  _ someone _ . It’s Jason Carter.

Something about that guy rubs Ben the wrong way, and he and Leslie look far too familiar for his liking.

And she’s smiling at him. That smile that Ben thought was special just for him. 

He doesn’t like it. Doesn’t like that Jason is talking to her just a little too closely. That his hand hovers just above her waist. That Leslie his angling her face up towards him and hanging onto his every word.

Jason whispers something in her ear, and that smile is back again.

Ben waits. He waits for Leslie to excuse herself and come back over to him, but it never happens. Instead, Jason takes her hand, and she follows him to the other side of the fire with his friends and a few other people that Ben doesn’t know.

And the worst part is that Leslie never once looks back for him.

Ben leaves not long after, and the next day, he finds his jacket hanging in his locker. He doesn’t know how Leslie was able to break in, but he somehow isn’t surprised that she did. There’s a little note pinned to it, thanking him for letting her use it and that she’s sorry she “must have missed him” before he left. 

Right, like she even noticed.

Ben crumples the note and slams his locker shut. 

~~~~~

Leslie walks Jason to his car, and he kisses her goodbye.

It still feels weird--not the actual kissing. That’s pretty good. It’s not like she’s had all that much experience before him, but she’s sure there must be  _ worse _ kissers. His lips are a little rough and chapped and sometimes his tongue doesn’t seem to know what it’s doing, but it’s still nice. 

No, what feels weird is this whole thing. She has a  _ boyfriend _ . And a pretty cute one, too. She never in a million years would have thought that someone like Jason Carter would be interested in her, but he is. 

And it feels nice to have someone care about her like this.

“I’ll see you tomorrow at school, okay?” he says, and Leslie nods.

“Yeah, I’ll see you.”

She sighs to herself when he drives away, a small smile tugging on her lips. She’s about to go inside when she sees Stephanie coming up the sidewalk.

“Hey, Leslie!” the not-so-little girl says to her. 

“Hi, Steph. Wow, I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever. When did you get so tall?”

She giggles. “Growth spurt. How are you? Was that hot guy your boyfriend?”

“Hey, when did you start to notice boys?”

That earns Leslie an eye roll. “You sound like Ben. I’m thirteen.”

“Wow, now I feel old. But anyway, yes, that’s my boyfriend. Jason.”

Steph gets this weird look in her eyes. “Huh. I guess I always thought--nevermind. Not important. Well, good job.”

“Thank you, I think. But anyway, enough about me. How are you? How’s school going?”

“It’s okay. A lot of homework. I have this huge project on the suffragette movement that I need to do, but I have no idea where to start. I should probably go home and work on that.”

“Oh my God! That’s one of my favorite periods in history. If you want, I can totally help you.”

“Really? You wouldn’t mind?”

Leslie waves her off. “Not at all. I’ll probably enjoy myself more helping you than I will just sitting at home.”

“Awesome! Well, you can come over right now. I know my mom won't care if you stay for dinner.”

They walk the few houses down, and just as they’re coming up the driveway, Ben comes around front pushing a wheelbarrow. 

Shirtless.

Leslie’s mouth goes dry, and she has to make sure her jaw isn’t hanging open.

He’s definitely not the scrawny twelve year old he was the last time she saw him without a shirt.

To be fair, he’s still kind of scrawny, but the work out he gets from baseball has given him some muscle. He’s nowhere near as muscular as Jason is, though.

Jason. Her boyfriend. As in, the person she should be ogling shirtless instead of her neighbor/former best friend. 

Ben drops the handles of the wheelbarrow and wipes at the sweat on his forehead. “Leslie! Uh, hi.”

“Hi.”

“Hi, Ben,” Steph says. “I’m here, too. Glad you noticed.”

It takes a second, but Ben’s eyes drift from Leslie over to his sister. “Good to know that you’ve inherited Henry’s sass. He’d be so proud.”

She rolls her eyes. “Yeah, right, like you don’t have it, too. Leslie’s gonna stay for dinner and help me with my history project.”

“Oh. Hey, Steph, I’m sure she’s busy, so I can help if--”

“No, it’s fine,” Leslie cuts in. “I’m the one that offered. It’ll be fun.”

“You’re covered in dirt and sweat,” Steph interrupts in disgust, but Leslie is far from grossed out.

“Yeah, I’m helping Mom out with some yardwork. You know, some of us still do the chores we’re supposed to.” 

Steph sticks out her tongue. “Well, have fun with that. Just make sure you don’t stink at the dinner table.”

“I’ll try my best.” He looks back at Leslie. “So, was that Jason’s car?”

“What?”

“The car that was parked out front. Is that Jason’s?”

All of a sudden, Leslie doesn’t want to talk about Jason anymore.

“Uhm, yeah. His Dad got it for him for his last birthday.”

“Hmm, must be nice.”

“It is.”

He nods and crosses his arms. “So, uh, how are things? With you and him, I mean.”

God, talk about awkward. “Good.”

“Good.”

Leslie can’t stop herself from staring again--as if she ever really stopped. It’s just--this is  _ Ben _ , and he’s shirtless in front of her. Before she can do anything  _ else _ embarrassing, Steph grabs her hand and leads her inside.

Mrs. Wyatt greets her with a warm hug and tells her she’s always welcome, which makes Leslie feel bad that it’s been so long since she’s come around. 

They set up in Steph’s room, Leslie getting lost in the project until she hears Ben’s voice. 

Well, more like Ben humming. She hears the door to the bathroom slam, and in her focus, she must not have noticed that he’d come back inside to take a shower.

Steph’s door is open just enough that she can see into the hallway, and Ben walks past on the way to his room.

Shirtless. With a towel wrapped low around his hips and water still glistening on his chest.

Good. Lord.

“BEN!” Steph shrieks. “God, put some clothes on. No one needs to see that.”

He doesn’t look back, just snickers and disappears from sight into his room.

“I’m sorry about him,” Steph says in the exasperated way that only a thirteen-year-old can. “He’s the worst. I swear, he lives to embarrass me.”

Leslie just smiles tightly. “Uh, it’s fine. I didn’t even really notice.”

“If I had a boyfriend that looked like yours, I probably wouldn’t pay attention to my brother either.”

“Hey, first of all, not nice. Second of all, you are  _ way _ too young to be thinking about boys like that. Not until you’re thirty.”

“Oh, yeah. You  _ definitely _ sound like Ben.”

Leslie spends the rest of the night focused on Steph’s project, except for dinner where she spends most of the time actively avoiding looking in Ben’s direction. She just can’t  _ unsee _ him soaking wet and wrapped in a towel. 

Which is terrible because she has a boyfriend. A really hot, nice boyfriend that is  _ totally _ into her.

And it should be him that she dreams about that night, but it isn’t.

~~~~~

 

Ben knocks on the Knope’s door several times, but there’s no answer. He knows Leslie’s home, so he goes with the baking dish in hand around to the back yard. It’s nice and warm outside, so he figures she’s on the back porch working on homework.

She’s not.

Ben scrunches his face and is about to walk back home when he hears something coming from the tree house.

It sounds like crying. 

He climbs up the old, wooden ladder for the first time in years, peering in to find Leslie sitting in the corner, her arms wrapped around her knees.

“Leslie?”

Startled, Leslie lifts up her head with wide, bloodshot eyes. 

“Ben? What? What are you doing here?”

He looks back down before climbing the rest of the way inside. “Uhm, my mom borrowed a baking dish from your mom. I was just coming to drop if off when I...heard you. Are you okay?”

It’s a stupid question. Of course she’s not okay.

She wipes at her eyes, but it doesn’t help much. “No. I don’t think that I am.”

He sits down next to her, the tight space putting them shoulder to shoulder. “You want to talk about it? This was always our safe space, remember? We used to tell each other everything here.”

“It’s stupid.”

“It can’t be stupid if it’s upset you this much.”

Her breath catches. “It’s Jason.”

Ben’s eyes narrow. “What happened? Did he hurt you? I swear to god if--”

“He broke up with me. He’s apparently doing some hot shot internship on the other side of the country over the summer, and he doesn’t want me holding him back or something.”

“He said that?”

She snorts. “No. His fucking  _ mother _ said that. He didn’t even have the balls to tell me himself so he had his mom do it for him.”

Ben wasn’t sure what shocks him the most, the fact that this asshole had his mom break up with her for him--or that he’s never once heard Leslie say fuck out loud. She must be pissed, and he doesn’t blame her. He wants to wring Jason’s neck.

“Good Lord. Seriously? That’s like...the ultimate dick move. I can’t believe it. I’m so sorry, Les. That guy’s a prick.”

“I just--what’s wrong with me, Ben? Why wasn’t I good enough? I thought things were going so well and all of a sudden I’m “holding him back”. He was the first person to notice and like me, and I thought he cared, but he couldn’t even break up with me to my face. I just feel so stupid.”

“Hey,” Ben says, tucking his finger under her trembling chin. “None of that-- _ none _ of it is true, okay? Jason is a grade-A asswipe. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You’re better than anything he could ever in a million years deserve, and the fact that he treated you that way is proof. 

“You, Leslie Knope, are easily one of the greatest people that I have ever met. You’re the person that became best friends with a shy little kid from Minnesota on his first day and never made him feel like an outsider. You volunteer with kids at summer camps because you  _ want  _ to, not because it looks good on a college application. You form clubs and plan bake sales and help my sister out with her homework. You try to see the good in everyone that you meet. 

“And I know this sucks. And even though he’s a fucking asshole, it’s okay to feel bad about it, but please, don’t let him make you think you’re anything less than amazing.”

It’s only a weak smile, but he’ll take it. “You really think that?”

“Of course I do.”

“Thank you, but I’m still pretty sad.”

“I know. It’s okay to be sad.”

She starts crying again, and he doesn’t even think when he pulls her into his arms.

The last time Ben held a crying Leslie was in this very spot on the day of her father’s funeral.

They had promised each other that they would always be there for one another, and he knows he’s broken that promise more times than he can count.

But at least for today, he can be the friend that she needs.


	5. Senior Year Part 1

God, her skin tastes so good. Like sugar and vanilla. Waffles and whipped cream. Every amazing thing all combined together to make the most perfect taste in the universe that can only be Leslie Knope.

It’s how he always imagined she’d taste. And believe him, he’s imagined plenty of times.

“Ben,” she moans when his kisses trail down her neck. Her fingers tangle in his hair and guides his lips to her breast.

“Leslie, you don’t know how long I’ve wanted to do this. How many times I’ve had dreams about this.”

She takes a sharp breath when he kisses a particular spot. “I think I might. You aren’t the only one that’s thought about this.”

Ben doesn’t remember when they both got naked, but they are, and it’s amazing. He can’t wait until he’s finally inside of her, but he wants to make every second of this last.

Leslie Knope is flushed and beautiful and  _ naked _ beneath him. He’s not wasting any opportunity to make her feel less than worshipped.

His mouth moves down her body, and soon he’s so close he can smell her. Almost taste her. And when he’s finally about to--

“Ben!”

A hand shoves his shoulder and his eyes fly open. He’s not in Leslie’s bed, or his bed back in Pawnee. No, he’s at his dad’s house. 

And it’s not Leslie that’s getting dressed next to him. It’s Tori, a girl he met through working for his dad. 

“What? What happened?” he asks, wiping the sleep from his eyes.

“I have to leave.”

“Oh, okay.”

“Yeah. Who’s Leslie?”

“What?”

Tori rolls her eyes. “Leslie. You were saying her name in your sleep. Who is she?”

Ben suddenly feels more embarrassed than he has in a very long time. “What? No one. Why--”

“Whoa, look, Ben. You don’t have to explain yourself to me. I’m not jealous or anything. I mean, I think we both agreed that whatever this is was just for fun. But I’m also not stupid, and know when someone is having sex dreams about someone else.”

Ben sighs. “She’s… she’s a friend from back home. Not my girlfriend, and I’m definitely not cheating on her or anything. It’s just--”

“You like her.” There wasn’t a hint of a question in her voice.

“I have... conflicted feelings. We used to be best friends when we were kids but we kind of drifted apart, I guess. I don’t know.”

“Well, your subconscious mind obviously knows more about how you feel about her than you do right now.” He raises his eyebrows, and she shrugs. “I want to major in psychology. I read up on this kind of shit.”

“Right. Well, I don’t think there’s much to read into. We have a weird history and my body obviously finds her attractive, so I had a sex dream. It’s not a big deal.”

“Normally, I’d have to agree with you. Let’s be real, guys dream about fucking basically anything that walks, but I have a gut feeling this is different. I don’t think it’s a good idea if we keep hooking up or whatever.”

Ben wants to argue, but he can’t. It’s just not in him.

“Right. Okay.”

“But it’s not you. You’re great. And I know we barely know each other so it’s not my place to say anything, but this Leslie girl obviously means a lot to you. Maybe you should focus on that instead. I don’t know. Call her or something.”

Ben nods and watches as Tori gathers the last of her things. “Sorry about all of this.”

She just laughs and waves him off. “Don’t be. It was fun. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to psychoanalyze you.”

“You’re welcome?”

“Well I do have to run. But seriously, call her. Just the little bit you’ve talked about her makes me think she’s very special to you.”

He almost wishes he could deny it, but it’s a lost cause. “She is.”

“Good. I hope things work out.”

He does, too, actually. “Uhm, thanks. For everything. Which as I say it outloud sounds weird.”

“Just a little bit. But you’re welcome, anyway. I’ll see you around.”

Tori’s words rattle around his brain for days, but every time he picks up the phone to call Leslie, he just can’t. 

Their relationship is way too complicated. They have a history, but their present is so confusing and inconsistent that his confession will seem like it’s coming out of nowhere and scare her away.

That’s the last thing he wants, and over time, he’s able to convince himself that maybe it was just his sex obsessed brain filling in Leslie for a role that could have been played by anyone.

Midwesterners are good at suppressing their feelings like that.

So yeah, everything’s fine and he  _ totally _ doesn’t have beyond friendship feelings for Leslie. 

The butterflies he gets in his stomach when he comes home and sees her again are totally normal. So is the way his body reacts to seeing her walk past his house in shorts and a tank top. 

Perfectly, totally normal.

~~~~~

Leslie can’t quite put her finger on it, but something’s off with Ben. They met for their traditional first walk to school as usual, and as tense as those have been in the past, this was different.

It wasn’t bad, either. His smile was warm and genuine when she stopped in front of his house, and they spent the time catching up on how their summers went.

It was actually really nice, so she wasn’t sure where this “offness” was coming from. Maybe it was the way he looked at her when they had to part ways or the excitement in his eyes when he realized they shared their history class this year.

Maybe it was the way he all of a sudden backed away from her like she was poison as soon as he got close.

It’s all very, very confusing and gives Leslie the kind of mixed signals that drive her crazy.

The last thing she needs are mixed signals. She doesn’t need to wonder what his looks or the extra smiles her way mean. Or wonder what it means when he doesn’t talk to her for days after she thinks they are just getting close again. 

Not when deep down, she knows how she feels about him. At first, the dreams confused her. She didn’t know why it was Ben that had seeped into her subconscious. Why Ben was the one kissing her all over her body, his hands and tongue making her  _ feel _ things.

Taking her virginity.

But he was, and she’d wake up flushed and sweaty with an unbearable ache between her thighs.

So Ben’s behavior does nothing but frustrate her already frustrated body and mind. 

And then there’s that seed of self-doubt that keeps on growing. 

Does he just want to be friends? Is the reason he pulls back so often because he thinks  _ she’s _ reading too much into it and doesn’t want her to get the wrong idea?

What that idea even is, she has no clue, but that’s the only explanation. 

But that has to be it. There’s no way that Ben  _ likes _ her. He can have any girl he wants, and if the rumors about him are true, he does. Not that she puts much stock in rumors, but still… he’s cute and the other girls in school seem to agree.

Ben’s already in the history classroom when she walks in, but he’s not alone. Cindy Eckert is standing right in front of his desk, a finger looped around a curl in her hair and her body angled in his direction.

Yeah, Leslie definitely can’t compete with that--not that she’s trying to. Sisterhood and all that is still super important, but she also knows realistically who Ben would be more likely to go for.

She is far from stupid.

So she takes her seat next to Ben and starts pulling out her binder and various colored pens and markers. 

She refuses to look up from her notes until a handful of Sweetums candies appear on her desk.

Leslie looks over, and Cindy’s long gone. All that’s left is Ben smiling in her direction. 

She wonders where Cindy went and makes herself believe it was just a coincidence that she left almost as soon as Leslie got there. But there’s candy on her desk, so who cares?

“What’s this?” Leslie asks. 

“Leftovers from Halloween for the trick-or-treaters. I hate the blue ones and you love them, so they’re yours now.”

Leslie unwraps one and pops it into her mouth. “Thanks. I always loved that you hated these. Trick-or-treating with you was the best because I got like half of your candy.”

“True. And we always had the best costumes. Speaking of which, why didn’t you come to Bobby’s halloween party? I looked for you but couldn’t find you.”

“Oh.” Leslie looks back down at her notes and tucks her hair behind her ear. “Uhm, I wasn’t invited. Which was fine cuz I just had a few friends over. My mom had a thing so I had to stay home to hand out candy anyway.”

Ugh, she hates it when he looks at her that way. That mix of concern and pity. Okay, so she’s  _ not _ the most popular person around. She knows what her reputation is, and she’s not ashamed of who she is. 

“If you wanted to go, you could have come with me, though.”

“Ben, it’s fine, really. I had fun with my friends. Besides, I did you a favor. Taking me would not have been a good social move for you.”

Ben’s a super genius, but sometimes he can be so stupid. He just creases his forehead and cocks his head to the side. “What do you mean?”

“Ben Wyatt, cool, varsity baseball player taking the nerd Leslie Knope.”

“Okay, that’s just ridiculous. I’m a huge nerd.”

“Yeah, but you’re a cute nerd that plays varsity sports. When you talk Dungeons and Dragons or Star Wars to a girl, all she’s looking at or thinking about is your… well, you know.”

He smirks and yeah,  _ that’s _ why the girls are all over him. “No, I don’t know. Care to enlighten me? What are they looking at? Is it my… baseball bat?”

Leslie wrinkles her nose and tosses a candy at his face, but that only makes him laugh. “You’re such an asshole, you know that?”

“I might have been told that once or twice.” He picks up the candy she threw and puts it back on her desk. “So, you think I’m cute?”

The bell rings just in time to save her from even more embarrassment, but she’s pretty sure that Ben can still see her face flushed bright red.

Of course he’s cute, but he won’t have the satisfaction of hearing it from her lips. Not today.

He’s still smiling to himself when class begins and he starts taking notes. That smile will be the death of her one day. She knows it and there’s nothing she can do to stop it.

And he’s making it harder and harder for her to deny whatever it is he’s making her feel. 

~~~~~

It’s a thought that Ben hasn’t been able to get out of his head for weeks.

Prom is only a few weeks away, and as of now, he’s dateless. Which is fine because he knows who he wants to ask, who he’d rather go with more than anyone else.

They’re both not in relationships, and as far as he knows, no one has asked her yet.

And he figures maybe this is his shot. His chance to get them out of this weird rut that they’re in.

Maybe it will lead to something even more. Maybe it will be the kick he needs to finally be honest with her about whatever is going on between them. 

He runs a hand through his hair and tugs on his varsity jacket before turning the corner towards her locker.

He stops when he sees Leslie standing there, her blonde hair pulled back as she talks and laughs with someone next to her.

It’s that kid from the AV club that’s been following her around like a puppy since sophomore year. He clenches his fist and has to quell the jealousy that’s in his chest. 

He has no right to be jealous, but that doesn’t stop the feeling. 

Ben stands as tall as he can and walks over to the pair, standing closer to Leslie than might be acceptable. 

Despite the distance between them lately, there is still that air of familiarity that won’t go away. That possessiveness that other people also seems to pick up between them.

There’s history there, and everyone knows it. 

Leslie’s smiling at something AV kid said when she turns. “Hey, Ben!”

“Hey, Les. Sorry to interrupt, but can I talk to you for a second.” He turns to the other boy. “Mind if I have a few minutes with her, Harry?”

“It’s Harvey.”

But Ben’s already ignoring him, looking back at Leslie. “It’s kind of important.”

“Yeah, sure.” She turns to Harvey and smiles. “I’ll catch up with you later, okay?”

His eyes flick over to Ben with an uneasy look that makes Ben stand just a little taller. 

“Okay. I’ll see you in class later. And when you pick out a dress, let me know the color. I can try to match my tie.”

Ben hates that she smiles like that to anyone that isn’t him. 

“Sure thing. I’m so excited!” 

Harvey brushes past Ben, and he swears there’s a triumphant smirk on the little prick’s face.

“So, what’s up?” Leslie asks as she switches out some binders in her locker. 

“Huh?”

“What did you want to talk to me about? You said it was important.”

“Oh, right. Uhm, wait, what did Harvey want?”

He cheeks flush red, and she tries to hide her smile. “He asked me to prom.”

It feels like all of the blood drains from Ben’s face. “H-he did? What did you say? Did you say yes?”

“I did. He’s sweet, and I think he’s had a crush on me for a while. I don’t know, I think it’ll be fun. It’s not like anyone else was gonna ask me anyway. He’s nice. We’ll have a good time.”

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. This is what he gets for waiting. For being too chickenshit to just ask her months ago like he wanted.

“But enough about that,” she says. “I highly doubt that was your super important question. What did you need to ask me?”

His tongue takes a while before it cooperates. “Uh, I had a question.”

“Yes, we’ve established that.”

“It was, uh, a question about homework. For history. I completely missed what the homework assignment was. Can you help me out?”

Leslie gives him a puzzled look, but nods her head. “Yeah, sure.” She opens up her agenda book and skims it. “History, history--oh here it is. Uhm, read the rest of chapter 12 and then answer questions three through six.”

“Right. Of course,” Ben says, finally stepping out of Leslie’s personal space. “Should have been paying more attention. You’re a lifesaver.”

“Tell me something I don’t know,” she smirks and slams her locker shut. “Oh, as official chairperson of the prom planning committee, I have to ask if you’re going to prom, too. And if you say no, be warned that I will take it as a personal offense and probably never speak to you again.”

He clears his throat. “Yeah, I think so. Just have to, you know, see if I can find the right person to ask.”

Leslie looks up at him with a small, almost sad smile. “I’m sure she’s out there somewhere.”

The bell rings, and Leslie’s eyes widen as she gives him a quick wave before running to class.

He waits until she’s out of sight before slamming his fist into a locker.


	6. Senior Year Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The latter half of senior year, including a very close run in at prom, their graduation, and one last sunset.

Leslie almost cries, she’s so happy. The hours spent fighting the administration over budgets and voting on themes, the time spent coordinating entertainment and decorations and setting up-- all of her hard work paid off. She’s finally at the prom of her dreams.

She walks in on Harvey’s arm, stopping to pose for their picture before crossing the gymnasium floor.

“Wow,” Harvey says. “This is fantastic. You did an amazing job.”

“Thanks. I’m just so happy. It’s so beautiful!”

Harvey’s hold on her arm tightens just a little. “I think you’re beautiful,” he says softly, like he’s almost afraid of her hearing him. 

Leslie lowers her head to hide her blush. “Thank you. I think you look very handsome.”

He smiles at her, and it breaks Leslie’s heart because he’s been nothing but the perfect date. And she is happy that she’s here with him, but he’s not--

_ Ben _ .

He walks in with a gorgeous Cindy Eckert on his arm, and Leslie tries not to feel sick.

It’s ridiculous. This is the night she's been waiting months--maybe years for. All of this happened because of work that she did, plans she made. She shouldn’t be on the verge of tears because Ben Wyatt is here with one of the prettiest girls in their school. Because of the rumors that he and Cindy were supposedly caught making out in one of the janitor’s closets last week. 

But that’s not Harvey’s fault, and he doesn’t deserve to be treated like a second choice.

She takes a deep breath and turns back to her date with a smile. “Do you want to grab some snacks and then dance?”

“I’d love to.”

Leslie does a good job of avoiding Ben most of the night. Sometimes it feels like she’s got this sixth sense when it comes to him. Like she knows where he is and when he’s watching her. So whenever he tries to catch her eye, she looks away.

It’s close to the end when Ben manages to catch her off guard. 

“Hey.”

Leslie almost chokes on a cookie. “Oh, uhm, hey. H-how are you? Are you having fun? Is the food okay?”

The words come out in a jumbled mess, and he quirks an eyebrow.

“I’m good. And yeah, tonight has been great. Seriously, you did such an amazing job with all of this. I shouldn’t be surprised, but you’ve really outdone yourself.”

“I had a lot of help.”

“Still, I’m very impressed. I know a Leslie Knope project when I see one.”

She hates that with a few kind words and his stupid smile, he can turn her into a pile of mush.

“So, uh, where’s Cindy?”

“Huh? Oh, I think she’s in the bathroom or something with friends. What about Harvey?”

“They were having some issues with sound system, so he went to help out. You know, AV club guy and all.”

Ben purses his lips and nods. “Right. Well, since our dates seem to be MIA, that’s no reason we should miss out on some fun, right?” He extends his arm. “You wanna dance?”

She should say no. Dancing with Ben is possibly the worst idea in the entire universe, but he looks so handsome. He’s her one weakness, and sometimes she wonders if he knows that. If he knows that she can’t deny him anything.

She barely nods, slowly taking his hand, and the way he smiles makes Leslie think that maybe he’s been wanting this to happen just as much as she has. 

He holds her so close that she can smell his cologne. It’s new, she can tell. Something special just for tonight. 

“I didn’t tell you how beautiful you look tonight, did I?”

“No.”

“Well, you do. I think you might be the prettiest girl here.”

“Thanks, but I’m pretty sure that title goes to your date. The votes were close for prom queen. The only reason Lindsay beat Cindy was because she promised that her rich dad would host a party if people voted for her.”

“Well, I voted for you, anyway.”

Leslie looks to the ground and laughs. “You don’t have to say that stuff. I don’t even know how I got on the ballot. I knew I wasn’t going to win.”

“Still, I voted for you. Either way, after all of the hard work you did to organize this, you're the queen, in my opinion.”

What do you even say to something like that? It’s like he’s trying to say all of the things she’s wanted to hear, but does he even mean them?

So she doesn’t say anything, just sways to the music as Ben’s hands rest on her waist like they belong there. Like she’s his.

She can feel him staring at her, so she lifts her head and turns her face towards his.

God, she loves his eyes, and right now it feels like they are staring into her soul. They flicker between her eyes and her lips.

Holy crap, he wants to kiss her. That’s what that means, right? She’s made out enough times to know that look, at least.

And as wrong as it is, she wants it to happen. She forgets about Harvey or Cindy. Forgets that they might be devastated if they come back to find their dates making out on the dance floor.

None of it matters to Leslie if it means she gets to know what Ben's lips feel like.

She can feel his breath on her mouth when the song ends, but a voice calls his name from across the gym.

Leslie pulls back so fast she thinks she might have given herself whiplash, but Ben doesn’t seem to want to let go of her waist.

“Ben! Hello? Can you hear me?” Cindy says as she and a few others walk towards them.

Leslie doesn’t like the way that Cindy is looking at her, or the way she curls her fingers around Ben’s arm.

“I heard you,” he answers casually--like he wasn’t caught almost kissing his former best friend. 

“Well, we’re all gonna head back to Billy’s for the afterparty. This thing’s getting lame.”

Ben is still so close. He has to notice her sharp breath. 

“Not yet. I was just--”

“No, it’s okay,” Leslie says, stepping out of his grasp. “You can go and do whatever.”

“Well, did you want to come to the party? You and Harvey--”

“Babe,” Cindy says in a clipped tone, and yeah, Leslie officially wants to cry. “There’s only enough food and beer for the people that were  _ invited _ .” Now that Leslie is gone, she puts an arm around his waist. “And all of the rooms have already been spoken for.”

There’s a knife twisting in her gut, and she’s impressed she can even speak. 

“It’s fine, Ben. You go and have fun. Harvey and I...we had plans anyway. It’s fine. I’ll see you around, okay?”

She leaves before he can say anything else, and she ignores him calling her name.

Harvey’s over by the DJ’s booth, and he looks so happy to see her that it just makes her feel even more confused.

“Hey, Leslie. Sorry, but I’m almost done here.”

“No, it’s fine. I just wanted to come find you, that’s all.”

After prom, she makes out with Harvey in his father’s car. 

She lets him touch her because she wants this. He’s cute and nice and  _ genuinely _ likes her. She deserves someone that likes her. That wants to be with her over anyone else. That looks at her like she’s hung the moon and stars.

It’s not his fault that he’s not Ben.

~~~~~

Ben is just one in the sea of blue caps out on the green. He hates that W is so far from K, and he has to crane his neck to search for her.

It feels like he’s always looking for her. No matter where he is, he needs to find her, even if she doesn’t know he’s there.

But to be fair, she usually knows when he’s seeking her out. It’s almost scary sometimes that she just  _ knows _ . 

Like right now. Just as his eyes land on her row, she looks in his direction.

Her smile is small and almost seems forced, but it’s more than he’s gotten in weeks, so he’ll take it.

Things after prom were...weird. 

She avoided him--rightfully so--after what happened between them on the dance floor.

He wanted to apologize, but he wasn’t sure what he would be apologizing for. 

The dancing? The almost kissing? None of those he was actually sorry for. Only for the way that it ended.

Ben’s still not sure why he left with Cindy, but he did. He did, and he saw how Leslie reacted. But when he saw her go to Harvey, and it was all too much.

Things with Cindy didn’t last much longer after that night, but it was still longer than it should have been. He should have just stayed behind and told Leslie the truth about everything, but he was a coward. 

That much hasn’t changed.

The ceremony is mind numbingly boring, but when it's time to accept their diplomas, Ben cheers the loudest when Leslie’s name is called.

Leslie stands with her mother when it’s over, and Ben can’t help himself. 

“We did it, Lessie!” he says with a huge smile and hugs her like he hasn’t in years. 

He can tell she’s surprised, but soon her arms wrap around him, and she tucks her face into his neck. 

“Lessie. Wow, I haven’t heard that name in a while.”

“It’s a special occasion.”

“It definitely is,” Marlene says once Leslie and Ben pull apart, opening up her own arms. “Come here, Benji. I’m proud of the both of you.”

“Thank you.” He looks over into the crowd to find his parents. “Uh oh. I think my Mom and Dad are about to have it out.” Without thinking, he grabs Leslie’s hand. “Come with me and say hi. I know my Mom, Steph, and Henry want to see you and say congratulations. Don’t feel bad if my Dad doesn’t remember who you are, though. I think he barely remembers who I am half the time.”

His parents voices are just above harsh whispers when they show up. 

“Mom, Dad. Look who I found.”

Julia turns from her ex-husband and smiles. “Leslie! Oh, come here. We’re so proud of you.”

“Look at this,” Henry says with a smirk. “Little Lessie Knope is all grown up. Come here, kid.”

“Hi, Henry,” Leslie smiles. “How’s college life?”

“Pretty great. But I don’t want to spoil the surprise when you find out in a few months.”

“Dad,” Ben says slowly, “you remember Leslie Knope, right? She’s been our neighbor in Pawnee since we moved.”

Steve eyes her up and down. “You’re the little blonde kid that Benny was always chasing after, right?” He looks to his son. “You dating her?”

“Jesus, Dad. No, we’re friends.”

“Well, why not. What's wrong with her? What’s wrong with you?”

“For god’s sake, Steve,” Julia says. “Leave the poor kids alone. I swear, you ruin everything.”

“Hey, no” Leslie cuts in. “It’s fine. Well, it was great to see all of you again, but I need to go find my mom.”

“Of course, sweetheart,” Julia says. “You’re coming to Ben’s graduation party, right?”

“Wouldn’t miss it. As long as he’s coming to mine, right?”

“You know it,” Ben answers. 

“Okay, well, I’ll see you later.”

“Bye.”

He watches her walk away and hug a few other students with wide smiles on their faces.

“Wow,” Henry says with a slap to Ben’s back. “So that’s Leslie Knope these days, huh?”

“Yup.”

“Not to sound too much like dad, but why are you two not together? Did she turn you down or something because it’s obvious you’re madly in love with her.”

“What? No, I’m not. We’re friends.”

“Well, yeah, but you could be  _ more _ than friends.”

“Would you just give it a rest, Henry,” Ben sighs. “She doesn’t...she doesn’t like me like that.”

“And you know this because she told you? Because you asked?”

“No, but I just know.”

“Oh, Benji, sometimes you’re just so stupid.”

“Alright, Henry,” Julia says. “Leave your brother alone. Let’s head home.”

Henry ruffles Ben’s hair and turns to leave, Ben looking for Leslie just one more time.

Because she always knows he’s there, she turns and offers a small smile. A real one this time.

He gives her one back.

~~~~~

Leslie’s running around her backyard setting everything up for her party when he arrives. He’s the first guest, which isn’t surprising considering he’s the closest, but he is a half hour early.

“Hey, I know I’m a bit early, but I wanted to see if there was anything I could do to help you set up.”

“Oh, that’s so nice. You didn’t have to do that.”

“Leslie, you came to  _ my _ graduation party over two hours early and helped my mom set up almost the entire thing. And baked. It’s the least I could do.”

“Uhm, okay. Well, the last big thing is hanging these banners between the trees. Can you hold the ladder for me?”

“Sure, but I can go up and--”

She waves him off. “No, it’s fine. Just hold the ladder steady and make sure I don’t fall and die.”

He walks over to her with a grin. “Yeah, we definitely don’t want that.”

Leslie starts unpacking what she needs from the boxes. “So, you excited for school?”

“Yeah, definitely. But I’m wanting to enjoy the summer first, though. I got a summer job up with my Dad so I can save some extra money. What about you?”

“Oh, I can’t wait. It’ll be hard leaving, but I’m so excited for my classes and making new friends. It’ll be great. Plus, I know a lot of people are also going to IU, so it’ll be nice to have some familiar faces.”

“True. I hope that means I can keep in touch with people.”

With you, he means, but doesn’t say it.

“Yeah, definitely.”

“Hey,” Ben says again after a brief silence. “I, uh, I know this is a few weeks too late, but I wanted to apologize. For what happened on prom night.”

Leslie goes still but won’t look up. “Oh? For what?”

“For what happened with Cindy, I guess? For how she was rude to you and not saying anything. For leaving like I did. It was stupid, and I regret that. I regret not spending enough time with you there like I wanted to.”

“Is that all you regret?”

Their almost kiss. At least, he thinks they almost kissed. Would she have let him? Would he have had the guts to go through with it?

“Yeah. I don’t regret anything else.”

It looks like her hands are shaking, but he can’t tell for sure. Soon, her happy mask comes back, and she smiles up at him.

“Apology accepted. I mean, it’s all water under the bridge. I hardly thought about it. Although, I am glad that you broke up with Cindy. She’s...very rude.”

Ben laughs and picks at the paint on the wooden picnic table. “Yeah, that’s one way to put it.”

She laughs, a full blown Leslie cackle that he’s missed hearing more than he cares to admit. “At least we can agree on that.” She pulls the banner out from the box and holds it up. “Ready to hang this bad boy up?”

Ben nods and stands at the base of the ladder, making an active effort to not stare at her ass even though it’s practically in his face. 

And boy, does he  _ really _ want to look.

Especially when she reaches high above her head and the edge of her shirt exposes a good inch of soft skin.

“Almost there,” she grunts. “Okay, got it.”

She’s coming back down when her foot slips on one of the rungs. It’s like one of those cliche scenes from a romantic comedy when he catches her and sets her upright.

“Whoa, careful. Are you okay?”

“Uhm, yeah,” she says. “Sorry, I just got clumsy I guess.”

“It’s okay. Good thing I was here, though, right?”

She smiles, and it’s not until both of her hands are on his shoulders that he realizes his arms are still wrapped around her.

And they’re close. Maybe even closer than they were on prom night when he almost kissed her.

He really wants to kiss her now, too.

“Leslie! Can you give me a hand with these trays, please?”

Leslie jumps back and out of Ben’s arms in milliseconds, looking over at her mother who walking out of the back door with several trays of food in her arms.

“Uhm, yeah, Mom.”

Marlene doesn’t look up until Leslie takes a few trays, and that’s when she notices him.

“Ben, you’re here early.”

“Uh, yes, ma’am. Just came to see if you or Leslie needed any help.”

A small smile crinkles her eyes. “You’re a sweet boy. There are a few extra sets of chairs in the basement that could be brought up, if you don’t mind.”

“Nope, not at all. I’ll go do that right now.”

It takes a few trips, but Ben brings all of the chairs out and sets them up. By the time he’s done, other guests start to arrive, and Leslie's changed into a patterned summer dress.

Ben doesn’t get another moment alone with her, but it’s okay. Seeing her so happy with the people she loves around her is enough for him right now.

And when he notices the locket he gave her on her sixteenth birthday hanging around her neck, nothing can wipe the smile off of his face.

~~~~~

Leslie stands at the edge of the woods overlooking the endless fields waiting for the sunset.

It’s one of her favorite places, the perfect spot to watch the unnatural--no seriously, very unnatural-- colors swirling across the Pawnee sky as the sun goes down. 

She hears a rustling behind her and grasps the pepper spray in her pocket. It could be a not-so-friendly hiker or family of rabid raccoons.

She doesn’t expect to see Ben Wyatt emerge from the woods, and judging by the surprised look on his face, he doesn’t expect to see her, either.

“Ben?”

“Leslie?”

“What are you--” they both say at the same time, and laugh.

“I came to watch the sunset,” Leslie says. “You know, one last sunset in Pawnee before I go off to school tomorrow.”

“Same, actually. I mean, the fumes are probably going to be what kills us someday, but it makes for one hell of a sunset.”

“It sure does.”

Ben comes to stand beside her so close that she swears if she moves her hand just a little bit, their fingers would brush.

It takes every ounce of self control to  _ not _ do that. 

“It’s so weird,” Ben says as the colors dance across the sky. “I can’t believe that we’re already here, you know? I can still remember the day I moved here, and now we’re going off to college.”

Leslie smiles sadly to herself. She remembers the day he moved here, too. For the longest time, she thought it as the best day of her life. The day that the best friend she’d ever had moved in down the street.

She’s still grateful that he’s in her life, but it’s so different now. She sometimes wonders if the pain she feels in her heart sometimes is worth it. If she just would have been better off if Ben stayed in Minnesota.

Leslie looks over at him, barely able to see the shadow of his profile as the sun goes down, and knows it’s not true.

He’s worth a million heart aches.

“Me neither,” she says. “A lot has happened since then, but this is just the next step in our amazing journey, right? What we need to follow our dreams.”

“Yeah. It’s just another Leslie and Ben adventure, right?”

Leslie laughs out loud. “Oh, my God, you remember those?”

“You mean do I remember the limited edition comic book series that you drew back in the fourth grade? Of course I do. My personal favorite was when Leslie and Ben team up to fight the evil villain that tried to steal the world’s supply of whipped cream.”

“And we kicked his cream stealing butt.”

Ben chuckles and shakes his head. “Man, those were the days.” He tears his eyes away from the sunset and looks at her in a way that makes her insides clench. “Do you ever miss it?”

She’s not sure what “it” is. Is it that carefree days of running around the neighborhood only caring about being home in time for dinner? The days where every problem seemed to be solved by going up to the treehouse? The days that they were each other’s everything?

It doesn’t matter what “it” is, because the answer is always --

“Yes, I do.”

“Me, too.”

They stand there in silence until the sun disappears from the sky and they are left in darkness.

“Did you walk here?” Ben asks, and Leslie nods.

“Come on. I’ll drive you back home.”

His hand reaches out and brushes her wrist. She wonders if he can feel the goosebumps rising on her skin.

“Okay.”

The drive is quiet, but for some reason it’s not the uncomfortable silence that seems to always surround them.

“Thank you,” Leslie says when Ben pulls up in front of her house.

Leslie closes the car door behind her and is walking up the driveway when he calls back out to her. She turns, and he’s leaning towards the passenger’s side window. 

He opens and shuts his mouth a few times, and Leslie feels like whatever he’s about to say is going to be either very good or very bad. Like  _ life changing _ levels of good or bad.

When he takes a deep breath, Leslie feels like he was stealing the air from her own lungs.

But then, he sighs and shakes his head. “Nothing, it’s just, I’ll see you around, okay? If you need help packing or unpacking stuff tomorrow, just let me know.”

She nods quickly but can’t bring herself to speak. It suddenly feels like her tongue weighs a thousand pounds.

She turns and runs to the house before she does something stupid.

Like tell him that she loves him.


	7. College

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first few years of college leading up their reunion at the Lake House.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's the last chapter of the prequel! But don't worry, I have a lot of ideas for drabbles here and there. Thanks so much for all your love and support!

It’s nearly the end of freshman year before she sees him again. Like,  _ really _ sees him.

The campus is fairly big, but she’s still seen him around, walking across the green or in and out of the library out of the corner of her eye. But she never talks to him, never goes over to say hi or tries to get his attention with a wave.

Leslie’s not sure why, either, but she just can’t bring herself to do it.

And college has been amazing even without Ben. Her roommate, Ann, is the most wonderful and beautiful soon-to-be nurse in the entire universe, and she quickly fills whatever void was left in her heart by the loss of Ben’s friendship.

But right now, as she is face to face with Ben in the middle of student center, she wishes Ann was there to give her strength.

“Leslie? Hey, how are you?” Ben says with equal surprise, as if he forgot that she even went to the same school as him. 

“Ben! Uhm, hi. I’m good. H-how are you?”

“Doing good. Just trying to survive the first year, you know. How are your classes going?”

“They’re great, actually. I’m really loving them.”

Ben grins and it makes Leslie’s heart skips a beat. God damnit. She shouldn’t still be feeling this. Not after all this time.

“I bet. You always did enjoy all of this stuff more than me.”

Leslie shrugs. “What can I say? I love me a good binder.”

Ben’s still laughing when a brunette comes up beside him with a wide smile. God, the dimples on that girl. Leslie would recognize those dimples anywhere.

“Hey, what’s so funny?” the girl says, and Ben’s wraps his arm around her shoulder.

Yeah, that doesn’t send a knife through Leslie’s insides at all.

“Nothing, just an inside joke,” Ben says to the girl before turning back to Leslie. “Leslie this is--”

“Shauna. From Pawnee. I remember you. You did a lot of things with the school paper.”

If her tone sounded harsh or short, Shauna didn’t seem to notice. Seriously, that girl was all smiles.

“Yes! And you’re Leslie. You basically did--everything else at the school.”

Leslie hopes her smile doesn’t look more like a grimace. “Yeah, but you know me. Had to always say busy. I, uh, I didn’t know you also came to IU.”

“Yup! I’m majoring in journalism.”

“Cool, cool. So, uh, how did you two, uhm, meet back up again, or whatever is going on right now.”

She’s trying really hard to not show how much she would rather be anywhere else, and thankfully Shauna doesn’t notice. But Ben does. Of  _ course _ he does. He still knows her better than anyone no matter how much she hates it.

His face falls and he slowly moves his arm from Shauna’s shoulder.

“Oh, well, funny story,” Shauna says. “We have the same english class and got paired up on an assignment. Must have been fate.”

Leslie pastes on her widest, fakest smile. “Wow, that’s great. Talk about reconnecting.”

“I know, right? Oh! We were just about to go grab lunch. You should totally come with us and catch up.”

Ben’s eyes light up. “Yeah, Les, it’ll be great to catch up.”

“Oh, uh, no. No thanks. I have so much to do and like 3 study binders to make and I have to call my, uh, uncle’s wife’s niece in law. Her...hamster is really, really sick. I just want to offer my condolences and support. She’s been with the family for years.”

“Oh, that’s so sad,” Shauna says, and Leslie feels bad that this poor girl actually believes her.

But not Ben.

“Oh, okay,” he says. “Maybe some other time.”

Leslie readjusts her backpack on her shoulder. “Yeah, totally. Definitely. Real, real soon, I would love to have lunch with just the two of you some other time. But I really have to go.”

She brushes past them and barely hears Shauna call out goodbye.

Later, when she cries into her pillow, and later, Ann’s arms, she vows that this is the last time Ben will ever make her feel this way. 

~~~~~

Things with Shauna didn’t last very long. Ben swears it had nothing to do with that run-in with Leslie. It was all purely coincidental that things went downhill after that. That he became more distant and everything she did just seemed to annoy him.

He doesn’t see Leslie for months after that, which is probably for the best. He focuses on surviving his first year and then working for his dad over the summer. He dates and tries not to think about how this one doesn’t laugh at his jokes like Leslie did or that one just doesn’t like whipped cream enough.

It’s stupid and selfish and makes not a damn bit of sense, but he can’t help it.

The next time he does see her is at a party halfway through their sophomore year. It’s like a scene from a movie where he sees her from across a room filled with drunken frat boys. She’s so gorgeous, and he’s just drunk enough to think it’s a good idea to  _ finally _ make a move on her. 

He wants to tell her how he can’t get her out of his head. How no girl has ever been able to live up to her. How he was so stupid to think he could just run away from this. 

He wants to tell her that he could see a future with her.

“Leslie!” he yells out, and she looks around in confusion until her eyes land on him.

The look she gives him is the last thing he expects. It wasn’t happy. She looks...scared. Like going over and talking to him is a fate worse than death.

And sober Ben would take that as a sign to drop it. But not drunk Ben. Drunk Ben doesn’t care. Drunk Ben wants to fall at Leslie’s feet and find a corner somewhere to make out with her face.

So he pushes his way past the crowd towards her. 

“Leslie. Hey.”

“Uh, hi, Ben.”

“Wow, it’s crazy to see you. How have you been?”

She bites her lips and tucks her hair behind her ear. “I’ve been good. You know, the usual. What about you?”

“Same. Broke up with Shauna, though. A while back.”

“Oh, that’s too bad.”

He nods and takes another swig from the cup in his hand. “Hey, do you want to get out of here? Maybe find someplace quiet to catch up? My room isn’t too far--”

“Oh, no, Ben, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

Ben reaches out and grabs her hand. “Awww, Lessie, why not? It’s been so long since we’ve talked.”

She stares at their joined hands, and even Ben can see something in here eyes for just a second. 

“I can’t leave. My boyfriend is around here somewhere.”

It feels like a kickboxer knocked him in the stomach. “Boyfriend?”

“Yeah. His name’s Dave. We met last year.”

“Oh. Is it serious?”

She pulls her hand away. “Yeah, pretty serious. We’ve been together for almost six months.”

“Huh. And this guy...he’s a good guy? He treats you well?”

She actually smiles. “Yeah. He’s really great and sweet. He treats me so well and really cares about me.”

And she deserves that. Probably more than anyone, but he still hates it.  _ He _ wants to give that to her.

“Wow. Uh, that’s really great. So are you in the same major?”

“Oh, no. He’s a criminal justice major.”

“Huh, so he wants to be a cop. I knew there had to be something wrong with him,” Ben teases, and honestly, it’s a miracle he’s still upright. 

“Hmm, so you still have that weird fear of cops. Yeah, he wants to be a cop, but he isn’t yet, so don’t worry. He can’t arrest you or anything.”

Ben watches as a red-haired guy makes his way over to them, dropping a kiss on Leslie’s cheek. He doesn’t know Dave, but he already hates him. 

“Dave, this is Ben. Ben, my boyfriend, Dave. Ben and I were neighbors growing up.”

And that alone kills him. He’s not Leslie’s friend, just her old neighbor, as though they didn’t used to be the most important people in each other’s lives. 

Dave smiles and puts out his hand. “It’s good to know you, Ben.”

“Yeah, good to meet you, too.”

The awkward tension is so thick that Ben almost chokes, and the only person that doesn’t seem to notice is Dave. Stupid, fucking Dave. 

God, he feels sick, and only some of it is because of the alcohol. 

He excuses himself in the worst kind of way, and doesn’t remember much else from that night.

He doesn’t remember the five or six more drinks, doesn’t remember bringing someone home with him or what her name is the next morning. 

All he knows is that she isn’t Leslie. 

It will never be Leslie.

~~~~~

From her bed, Leslie watches Ann run around their room getting ready. Ann looks so amazing in her tight dress and black heels, while Leslie looks like a bum in sweats. 

“Are you sure you don’t want come to Donna’s party with me?” Ann asks. “Everyone will be there.”

Leslie curls up into a tighter ball. “Yeah, I’m sure. I just don’t feel up to it.”

Ann sighs and sits on the bed next to her. “But it’ll be good for you. I know you’re feeling down, but you weren’t really with Justin for that long. Him breaking up with you shouldn’t have you feeling this badly about yourself. You’re hot and single and should enjoy yourself.”

Leslie and Dave broke up near the end of Sophomore year, and Leslie’s had a few boyfriends since then. Some serious, some not, but it never feels good to be broken up with. 

“I just don’t feel up to it, that’s all. Just one night of wallowing in self-pity is all I need, then I’ll be back on my feet again.”

“Are you sure you’ll be okay on your own? I can stay--”

“Ann Perkins, you don’t even finish that sentence. I am a big girl. You go out and have a great time.”

“Only if you’re sure.”

Leslie laughs and pushes Ann off of the bed. “Yes, I’m sure. You look too good right now to have it wasted on me.”

“Okay. Oh, can I borrow some earrings?”

Leslie waves towards her little jewelry box on her dresser. “Go for it.”

Ann opens the box and picks through it before gasping. “Oh my God, Leslie, this is beautiful,” she says and pulls a locket out of the box. “Why have I never seen you wear this before?”

“Oh, I don’t know. I guess I’ve never really had the opportunity.”

“Where did you get it. It’s amazing?”

She sighs and flops onto her side. “It was a birthday present when I turned sixteen. There’s a picture of my dad inside.”

“That’s so sweet. Wait, why do you look miserable.”

She rolls her face into her pillow and mumbles.

“What?” Ann asks. “I can’t hear a word you’re saying.”

“I said that Ben gave it to me.”

“Wait, Ben Wyatt? As in childhood best friend? As in the guy that you cried for days over freshman year and then ran into when you were dating Dave and it got all weird because he’s obviously in love with you?”

“Ann, stop it! He’s  _ not _ in love with me or whatever. We were friends as kids and now we barely talk. He definitely never liked me. I’m not his type, and based on the fact that he always seems to have girls hanging off of him, he’s definitely not wanting to date  _ me _ .”

“Whatever. I’m just saying, you two have a history and this is a really nice gift. Not something you give to a “friend”.”

“You don’t understand. It’s not like that between us.”

Ann raised her eyebrows. “But you want it to be.”

“I don't know, Ann! Maybe I did at some point, but I'm over it now. I can’t keep wasting my time wishing for something to happen that isn’t going to. I accepted that a long time ago. He was really important to me at some point in my life, but not anymore. I mean, we’ve seen each other like twice in the three years we’ve been going to the exact same college. It’s not like either of us cares enough to make the effort.”

With a sigh, Ann puts the locket back and grabs the earrings she was looking for. “Okay, if you say so. I just hate seeing you so down like this.”

“I’m fine. Trust me.”

“Good. And we’re still going to Donna’s lakehouse next weekend, right?”

“Definitely. It’ll be just what I need.”

Ann applies her lipstick and leaves with a quick goodbye and makes Leslie promise to come if she feels up to it.

But she doesn’t. Now on top of thinking about Justin, Ben’s on her mind again, which is the last thing she needs.

Of course she misses him, misses what they used to be, but that’s just what happens. That’s life, and the sooner she accepts it, the easier everything else will be. She just wishes she had accepted it two years ago like she was supposed to. 

It’ll happen eventually. Who knows, maybe she’ll meet someone at Donna’s lakehouse that will make her forget who Ben Wyatt even is.

But until then, she was giving herself just this one night to feel something again. 

~~~~~

“You know, it is just simply amazing,” Chris says, and Ben looks up from his math book. 

“What’s amazing?”

“That we have been roommates for almost two years and I have never once really looked closely at this wonderful photo collage you have on your wall. It’s delightful. Like a journey down the path of your life that led you to this very moment.”

“Uh, yeah.”

Chris hums to himself as he looks through the pictures, and Ben does his best to drown him out and focus on the pages in front of him.

“My, it looks like you were quite the baseball player, Ben. So many team pictures.”

“Yeah I played little league as a kid and then on the JV and Varsity team in high school. Haven’t played since then, though.”

“Look at how young you were here!” He points to the picture of him and Leslie the year they won their little league championship.

Ben looks up and smiles sadly. “Yeah, that was the only year we won the little league championship. That’s Leslie Knope there. She was the first girl to ever play Pawnee Little League.”

“You two looked like you were very good friends.”

“We were. Practically inseparable.”

“Do you know where Leslie Knope is now.”

“Yeah.” Ben sighs again. “She actually goes here. I’ve seen her a few times, but… you know how things go. People just drift apart.”

Chris sits down next to Ben with his own melodramatic sigh. “Funny how life works with the people it brings in and out of your lives.”

It’s true, Ben thinks, and truth be told, he hates it. He hates that Leslie isn’t in his life anymore, has hated it for years, but he never did anything about it. For some reason, it just never felt like the right time, or he was too much of a selfish asshole to see past everything and just be content to have her as a friend. 

He knows he gave her mixed signals and then would get jealous when she was in a relationship, which wasn’t fair to her. 

Ben just misses her.

“Well,” Chris says as he stands, “good, solid friendships can survive almost anything. I have no doubt that if you were to reach out to her again, it will be as though almost no time has passed.”

“That sounds nice, Chris. Thanks.”

“Anytime, my friend. Anytime.”

“Oh,” Ben says, “what are you doing next weekend? A friend of mine is having a small get together at her family’s lake house, and she said I could invite people. You interested?”

“A lake house? That  _ literally _ sounds like the greatest, most wonderful place in the entire universe. I would love to go with you. Also, I have been wanting to do more open water swimming, so this will be perfect. I just have remember to pack my wetsuit.”

Ben chuckles to himself and goes back to studying, but not before taking one last look at the picture and thinks that maybe, someday, he and Leslie can have that back again. 


End file.
